its me!

2010-01-28T23:26:00.002+08:00

oh dear...this blog is so dead.
how?
last sun was a working day at optical shop...din do much..coz im kindof "everything dunno"
the rest were busy with their own stuff, so i try not to disturb them and handle the customers myself.unless no choice, really stunnued by their qns..
hmm, let me see if i rmb their names...jeremy, raymond, andy, muffie(erm, i dunno how to spell!)yup, got to meet four of them, one more i should be ableto see himthis coming sun!
and because i need to work, i had to sacrifice my outing with the girls! omg...
i quite scaredof the optom there, raymond...dunno, but i guess he has the aura that makes me afraid of him. but he is a nice guy though...
hope this sunday is a pleasant day too!
they were very warm towards me...make me less nervous on my first day...so lucky me! they like to joke! but they were much older than me! hmm, the youngest, raymond, was 29/30 yo!the rest 31 32 36...wowow~ a bunch of older men...
having blisters now on both my legs...thanks to the heels...which i reluctantly had to wear as i forogt to buy my blackie flats on sat!
but i got it yesterday...so i shall be comfortable on sunday! hehe

today was BV prac test. i realise i cannot partner guys for pracs...sure will make mistakes. the previous cl fitting prac also. i answered mrs tan's qn wrong...her qn caught me by surprise.that i totally forgot about it...askme anything and i will stare at you blankly...serious blockkkk
hope and hope i wun fall....

erm, seriously, during prac we have to make the lecturer say"confirm plus chop the recording is like that" den we can proceed..else this lecturer says this, that lecturer say that...we will be confused. for one of the recording today, i had always recorded that way, and had always let lecturers check, and they had nv corrected me. but today, i was corrected not to record that way!! omg
now im so worried
tmr slide test for cl fitting...all the best to me!

2010-01-07T23:35:00.002+08:00

photos uploading! into facebook...slowly slowly...
anway, today wad the first day of the open house of the 5 polys...
me and lyn went for the second shift, which was from 1 to 3.30pm
once we reached there, we just started introducing when the secondary school students approached our booth...nice people!
we had them to play with some optical illusions... colour vision testings...and let them see the test for stereopsis etc
quite few stuff actually...so we were like talking and talking non stop...
never tried to talk for so long before, i kept drinking water to quench my thirst.
i was impressed by one of the optical illusions...the albert einstein and marilyn monroe...
with glasses, we will see albert einstein, and after removing glasses we will see marilyn monroe...other than that, those without specs can simply converge ur eyes and it works as well!
nice!
and another one was the counting of the number of Fs in a particular sentence...me and lyn failed that! there should be a total of 6 Fs, but we only saw 3...know why? cozwe simply missed out the F from all the 3 "of" in the sentence... our brain cannot process the word of so people tend to miss that out... fun?

basically, it was interesting to help out there!

after that we just took a walk around the open house and met shichieh and tzehoon before home sweet home!
on the train, there was this cute malay baby girl... quite chubby and she like to smile...tzehoon just moved and eyebrow and that can make her laugh too! adorable kiddo! ^^

2010-01-03T23:41:00.003+08:00

hi!

i can even cry reading a book!

yesterday was in the mrt, reading this book by Lurlene McDaniel...two stories in a book: Too young to die and Goodbye Doesn't Mean Forever

this two stories were talking about the same girl Melissa who was so poor, but very very good in her studies. she had a mom, elder brother and a best friend Jory. her life was so nice when even the school's most popular guy wanted to date her. But it all ended when she started to have bruises out of nowhere. And finally, diagnosed with cancer.

she was angry, at everything, everyone and her mother...she said it was her mother's fault for it was her mother who had brought her to the world and brought her to this torture. she had very beautiful hair, but she cut it before the chemo did...

she underwent chemo, and she turned for the better. she went into remission(means the chemo worked for her, she is well, and if she is able to remain in remission for 5 years, means she is fully recovered from leukemia...)

she did, went into remission, and her life went back to normal...just for one year..

and she went back to the hospital, with her relapse.

this time round chemo does minimal help. only a transplant can lead to some miracle...the bone marrow was from her brother. after the transplant, she showed signs of rejection. she struggled for a very long time, when the signs of rejection subsided. everyone thot she was well, but in the end, it wasn't the rejection...it was something else. Meningitis had her heart damaged...so her heart gave way one night...

she left letters for her mom, brother and Jory. really touching ones... she was only 17 when she died,when everything starts for her as a highschool girl. she should be doing everything she should as a 17 year old. instead, she was forced to stay in the hospital for months and months. despte all the fighting and optimism, she was still taken away.

Rain fall on the just and unjust

right, isn't it? There is not really such a thing that good people gets the good endings while the bad ends up terrible...

17 was supposed to be a happy year for melissa, where she gets all the scholarships she longed for and romance to go for. however, she had to turn mature, face this battle, a tough and invading battle. she lost in the end, but she taught people around her to become more tough, mature and most importantly, to cherish the ones around when they are till able to.

Had i forgot to mention rachel? yup, this little 4 year old was a very good little sister to melissa. they met int he hospital, rachel suffers from luekemia as well. but she died as well.. she was such a dear.

i just feel sour when i got to know that melissa died. so tears just dropped...
Rain fall on the just and unjust

learn to cherish, live happy and face it, when anything come your way.

2009-12-30T19:11:00.002+08:00

just got back from korea!
nice holidays....
details shall wait...photos even later
hee
have hundreds of photos to load...think i can upload all of them? kill me please..
had an enjoyable time there
with the peopl there...nice and professional tour guide...its nice to listen to her...her name was annie! she wasnt from korea, but married from taiwan to korea..
then there is the assistant, brad. korean guy...
like at least there is one out of all that i saw was good looking =S
not me say he is good looking!
haa

last day, which was yesterday, at the incheon airport, was pissed off with this auntie...i went to buy some donuts for my parents. when i came back, i saw the younger ones sitting down there waiting so i gave them two...ok, i know i only bought 4...excluding myself...coz i dun wanna eat. in the end, i din buy for the others and this auntie came to my dad and said,"u cannot like that, if wanan buy, must buy for all the rest, coz its not nice to buy for yourself only." waaa, after i heard that, i was so pissed man!

its not that i am stingy that i dun wanna buy for them to eat...and its not only for me or for my parents can, i bought for the kids too lo!

before she said that, we were queuing for the checking in of the luggauges. then she saw me passing the donut to my dad, she was like,"wa nv buy for us to eat! we also haven eat lehh" so i offered her, den she say"dun want la, full already" she even show the pissed face la...

am i wrong?
i din buy for them coz there isnt enough time, and i dunno if they wanna eat and eat what!
later i buy and they all dun like how? she finish for me?

initially i thot she was a nice auntie, but in the end...think she only think of herself and her brothers and sisters and the kids.
once my parents were the lastest to come down form the hotel, she was like telling me, "next time u come down, check on your parents first." whatever la!
pissed...
her husband buy stuff for his relatives also cannot! wth!
keep saying buy so much for what all the relatives were there already, no need buy le la...
but in fact the relatives who were there were relatives from her side, and not her husband side! husband's side relatives not family? cannot buy for them?

these eight days i totally changed impression of her!

2009-12-22T00:22:00.002+08:00

today met up with meieng, jasmine and shuping for shopping at orchard 313...they were doing their christmas gift shopping whie me adn shuping considered window shopping..
after that, jasmine went off and we went for dinner at far east with qingren...
he hosting a potluck gathering at his place but me cant go!
coz it on the 27th....

finished packing luggage already and had a checklist for tmr...in case i din gat anything important into the luggage!
had a dream last week, dreamt that i went on a holiday without my handphone and camera charger! disastrous man! but the place i went to was london and not korea! haha!

i also had my "extra" table cleaned and cleared...haha, like more spacious now...
=D
alright, signing out!

2009-12-17T23:55:00.002+08:00

yesterday went to see him!!

haha, but yup, though not very close, but still quite close!

went with Tomoko, but her focus not on him! is on Calvin Chen...

He is sick! (so sad)

so first part of the showcase, he was quite stone and coughed quite alot...(sad!)

think its very irritating to the throat when you have to sing...that kind of feeling is just so uncomfortable! so he quite poor thing ya...then still have to smile at the numerous cameras!

but after first 2 songs, and first game, he was brought down the stage for a tinny winny rest...guess he went down for water...coz water just do wonders to the hurtful throat...

went he was back on stage, he was back to his normal self! hehe

like to smile and laugh...

someone gave him a care bear! hehe the blue one...the one that i hung on my bag! the blue one! but i dunno what care bear is that =S

haha! just that what he got was a bigger one...much bigger than mine...but equally cute carebear =D

liked him because of his singing...liked him because he plays the piano...liked him because he plays the flute!

my camera focus was on him...and gosh, sounded like some stalker blehhhh

but but but, i find that i'm totally not the type of person who can tahan queuing for this type of idol stuff...we reached there at 4.45pm when the actual starting time was 7pm...and we were already way way behind!

and the two of us chatted and chatted...till we got all so restless!

no fun queuing there like that...so in the end we were on our feet for 6 hours! and not to mention the tiptoe-ing...

think this should be the first and last time??

hehe

and me now counting down to 22dec! 4 more days....wow wee!

2009-12-14T01:08:00.002+08:00

counting down to 8 more days!
today went for the O school recital at republic poly... simply great! especially the O crew, which are the dance instructors.
marvalous....
just maybe the sound system wasnt that heart throbbing, so maybe the effect to the audience wasnt much carried. some parts wasnt exciting, but just feeling "wa, very cool!" instead of "WOW VERY COOL!"
tired, mon, to school for the videoing for our gems assignment... hope cant chop chop finish, dun wanna drag and drag and dragggg.
we still need to think of plot and plan how to shoot etc... hmm

going for vaccination in the moring, hopefully....
argh i hate needles poking into my arm...though it isnt pain, but it just look so intimidating to me...

i should start excercising my arms, else i cant do what i always wanted....which is to donate blood...
i dun wanna be there and being told that they cant do the job, coz its difficult to get my blood to fill that one packet!
so maybe i cant excersice my arm, den with clearer vessels, they can do the job easier!
but still if i can donate, i need the courage to go for it as well!

timid girl girl~

2009-12-03T21:33:00.002+08:00

tralalaa~ today went for lessons as usual...and the test was...er herm....i got no idea how it will turn out. just did what i know, and hope for the best?
our class only lynnie going for the chiang rai overseas itp trip...all others...*sigh*
im not as bold as lyn i would say... coz if im the only one going for the trip, i will be omg! can i withdraw??
she just said it will be like an orientation camp haha! coz all of us arent that close to the other classes...
and these few days was quite pissed with myself...coz i kept forgetting stuff...like today, forgot to do my bino vision lab quiz AGAIN
other than that, there are other stuff im not pleased with myself...
well, have to slap myself awake!

bye!

2009-11-21T11:40:00.003+08:00

hi!
so long ago was my last emo post...
but now, no..
spmp coming to an end, and the last part of it, i just hope it is not screwed...

my gems module, human dieases, was fun!
first think we covered was heart dieases and watched a few videos on it...
so now we know what causes the increased risk of an heart problem!
we even watched the process of the heart transplantation video!!! cool and i can say...the human heart is....CUTE

and ya, the birth process, was even ewww... moms are wonderful is what i can say=D

now doing on infectious dieases, and saw some really bad sides from the industry, not in SG though...D=

hmm, went for the chiang rai overseas itp interiew...though i think it was not necessary, i think i did not do so good in it la.. but nvm, i was prepared not to be selected!

the cl fitting prac test was not very well done as well, just hope it still survivesssss

finally today my parents going to exchange for korean money... these few days was like checking the rates everyday and it stays almost stagnant...maybe 1 or 2 won up and down.. so today, just go for it and exchange...

yesterday was Arron Yan's birthday! haha random..
mst's coming how!!!

2009-11-12T21:10:00.001+08:00

I'm a boring person, i understand...
ppl have slowly and gradually removed me out of their lives...
i just know that.

the email that makes me think

2009-11-03T22:44:00.003+08:00

tralala~
very sweet email i received just now...i think i got it before, just forgot about it...
about these two person who taught us our first things in life, first words and spent the time watching over us....den when we get older, bigger, we neglected them.

really, i cant stand seeing some elders sitting alone in the living room watching tv...ok, maybe i wun go there talk to him or her, but i just dun have a nice feeling. for instance, i saw my uncle sitting there watching tv alone in the living room, while we were in the room chatting and laughing. suddenly, i felt so bad, i can say i'm not exactly close to my uncle coz we dun really talk... we belong to differnt parts. like when i'm over for dinner, the parents will be tgt, and we young ones will be tgt...so we dun really interact...just once in a while...

so that time, when i saw my uncle sitting there alone, i felt so bad and uncomfy, but i cant bring myself to sit down to talk to them, coz i know i'm no good at talking to him, so i just went to the toilet and back into the room to my cousins.

he gave me a feeling like he was bored, but no one was there to accompany him, and he cant do anything about it.
but that was not the case.. we will talk to him, he will laugh and joke with us...most of the time!
just that it was that particular day, he looked so lonely to me.

i wonder if my parents will be like that one day...
coz one of them will go away sooner or later, one before the other.
me and brother will have our own lives, and they will be all alone...it breaks my heart by just thinking of it...

2009-10-29T23:46:00.002+08:00

dear ariel!

missed her alot...i wanna go visit her, but it seems so out of the way! have to go all the way to thompson!

its been almost two weeks since school started.

was still quite okie. and i hope it stays okie till the end!

yesterday was cousin's 30th birthday! haha, the nice nice cousin who likes to take care of the younger ones...^^

it was like finally, i can feel that i am part of them..

so went her house for steamboat with other cousins. though i eat from a bowl (coz i cant have seafood! D= ), but i'm still super duper full after dinner. full till i dun wanna sit...

den we all stayed in the room to slack ard and chit chat. after that, we had a mini drinking session, where we had white wine and icewine^^ first time trying both types of wine and i really prefer icewine. it tastes nicer! though white wine was not exactly bad, just i'm not used to the taste i think.

only had a little of each, but my face was so red and my face feels so warm after drinking!

but luckily, the redness was not obvious when i got home... phew...else my mom will be pissed if she know i go drinking when i still had to avoid lots of stuff!

also, tsk, i din bring my camera, else will have pictures!

well ya! bye!

2009-10-18T20:55:00.003+08:00

tmr is school day!
ohmygosh, everyday waking up at 6 is torturous...luckily i have got my mommy to wake me up when i cant in the morning! ^^

last night, my laptop scared the hell out of me. i left it on while i do my stuff outside, den when i came back, it was blacked-out, and i cant turn it on again!
i was so panicky that i even went to the HP's webbie and left an email telling them the problem. after which, i came back to my room to check it out again, den i saw the power light blinking...so i tried by bringing the whole lappy to my parents' room and plug it in. and it works! so in simple terms, i'm freaked out by something small and dumb!

fri was shopping day with parents but main purpose was to get our winter clothes!
and i got it, a red one! muahaha...=DD

new HK tvb drama, 有营主妇。。。it should be not bad, so i will slowly watch it!
now i wanna catch others as well, like erm...the next from the 学警 series. but i dunno how to read the two words behind...
also, 古灵警探B it should be cute too, but i have started...

ohmy so many....nvm, slowly..^^

2009-10-14T22:52:00.002+08:00

lala, today went jurog safra for kbox!
oh, so nice to sing at kbox...
it was quite different from the ones i went before....the decor i mean.
so oldies kind of style.

i wanna go to the playground there!
i sound like a kid...but really wanna go check it out!
its three storeys high!
sometimes its nice to reminisce those childhood times when u are given a chance you know... =D

yesterday to doreen's house.
the purpose there is to go play wii...
wii fit is useful? i dunno...maybe yes maybe no...
playing games, like training balancing skills, aerobics, or yoga!

well, the main point was not on the wii fit...it was cooking MAMA!
liked that game!
played on a Nds and iphone...but never tried on wii before...totally different man...
we were like taking turns and to make a fool of ourselves...coz we dun really know how to play yet!
and yup, had a really really good good laugh!!!
these two days were nice and sweet...what about the next few?

school is starting next week..
gems...Human Disease-past present future...taught by a lecturer whom i dun really like, coz he is like full of weird things...i cant expect or predict what he is going to do...but yup, one more sem of gems and it will be gone!

monday...its an 8 to 6 day 1 for year 2 sem 2!
ohmygosh

tmr going out with cousin...to shop!
i hope i can get something not very expensive yet pretty and able to keep me out of the winter cold in december in korea!
i guess i'm asking for too much, haha...winter clothes...any cheap ones? i guess not!
but my parents went to check out the prices without me the other day...and they told me they were like 150 bucks...
ohmy, though its not my money, but i feel bad about my parents pocket...

i love winter. this season may mean having to wrap myself in thick clothes and turn myself into a round ball or dumpling. but winter is beautiful...to me...
=D

timetable is out!

2009-10-07T14:17:00.002+08:00

timetable is out!
not as horrible as before...
mon will be the longest of the week, till 6pm
tue, at 2pm
wed to fri is till 12!
muahaha, but that is without gems...
with gems, either wed or fri will be ending at 3...

yesterday out with doreen, tzehoon, shichieh, szeyin...to get present for yumin and szeyin...
was nice to be out with them after not seeing them for a month! haha

byee!

2009-10-06T02:06:00.002+08:00

any comment with this?

random uh...finally, tmr going out! breathing some fresh air from outside!
hope i can do what i intended on doing tmr...
first to the national library, to borrow books, then to SP library, to return books, finally to orchard to meet dear classmates!

had been having very unhealthy sleeping habits these couple of weeks...sleeping at 5 6 am and waking up as late as 4pm in the late afternoon...trying to change back...hopefully

all right, going off! bye!

2009-09-29T04:38:00.005+08:00

they are trying to entertain themselves? using veggie??

i find the two of them very cute...especially tavia...=D

the way she talk and the way she behave is funny...

the happy family! above!

P.S though short of one more person!

haah, oops, hope no copyright ya, got these pics from...somewhere...i forgot!
starting of fourth week of chicken pox!
still towing and surviving though...
lalala~
see the huge mooncake? its said to be 33"! cool...it sure taste as nice too!

should not be going to the BBQ...saded...
i dunno, but my mood was not very good....thinking that chicken pox takes alot of my freedom away. coz i need to avoid certain food, cant get out of house, cant do alot of things!
but its just the childish side of me, trying to throw tantrum when things doesn't go my way.

i admit that i'm being petty...but i dunno how to change...or i dun wanna change..
i dun want to be a no-temper person...its tough for me.
i dunno why am i that pissed when the certain subject is the main topic or our conversation.
i no longer can be the good fren. no longer, i am sure.
i will no longer put my mind in doing what i should as a friend.
if i cant find the kind of friend i need in you, then i shall move on...

Hilary, Brenda, ShuRong, JIngWen, Xinyi...miss you all!!!!!!!! when can we get together???

someone's birthday is up on the way...though i dun think the five of you may see this, but let me think....what to get for the birthday girl!!! oops, i still owe someone's present...will get it once i can get my butt out of the house!! hee^^

2009-09-17T23:37:00.002+08:00

this guy, named Vincent, 温家恒, played the role of 甘永中in 唐心风暴之家好月圆。

i suppose he is someone new in filming drama, but he is not exactly new in TVB...

he looks quite cute....and in the drama, he acted as the youngest in the family.

but just to emphasize, this drama is nice...should watch it...^^

back to the boring me...!

had been chasing this drama series....and trying not to watch too fast...coz i'm afraid if watch too fast, after i finish watching, i will be left with nothing to do!

ohmy, i have never tried so long not stepping out of my house...

BOREDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

2009-09-10T14:27:00.000+08:00

only one word to describe -- bored!
needa drink lots of herbal drinks...
stomach turning and turning...
everyday eat same thing....(that i dun really mind though =D)
everyday watch tv use computer....
fever on and off, and i kept having headaches...

today is only the 4th day! i hed to wait...till a month before i'm free to eat mostof the things!
going out, maybe two weeks later...hopefully my mom will allow...

alrighto!

one important thing today!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO SHU! 18TH!

2009-09-09T12:00:00.000+08:00

i'm just wondering, is my birthday that insignificant that they have to forget? this question had been lingering around in my mind for so long...since the day 230409 ended...

2009-09-07T00:31:00.004+08:00

today, went for pedicure!
hehe, used couz's package.
never tried a pedicure before, and the experience was WOW...coz my cousin allow me to use her spa package...
so now, i've got blue toenails!
reason for this pedicure was simply coz of boredom at my uncle's house...today went over for praying..
my cousin asked me to go for it since it so near their place and i'm feeling so bored over there...

after we got home, my neighbour told us something happened to their house in the day. know what? doings of the l_ _n S_ _ _Ks! they are simply so immorale! they used a chain to to lock my neighbour's gate! police came but nothing can be done, coz the chain had been touched my my neighbour and the chain has got their fingerprints...so they cant really get any evidence form the chain. it not my neighbour who borrowed money from those people. it was somebody else! they are just trying to use their neighbours as a revenge or something! innocent people gets involved...

this kinda people should be all j_ _ _ _ _! not only do they harm to those who owed them, they also harm those innocent ones! ARGH!

Friends Forever

2009-09-04T23:45:00.005+08:00

yep, doreen and me! yesterday, 3 sept, went for present searching and lunch and movie!

the proposal was really really really superb!

hilarious, and sweet romance!

i din manage to get my present, coz we kinda spent alot yesterday!

so, my wallet was empty at the end of the day!

yesterday was a nice day out with DO

and tracking back to wed, the last day of year 2 sem 1..HopefullY

we girls went for lunch and wanted to catch a movie. decided on the final destination...but shichieh and DO cannot watch...coz the movie is M18! and they are not 18!

hah, in the end, went for turning pt, was not a very good one, but also not a bad one..so maybe a 3/5?

and today?

what i did?

nth constructive...maybe help with a little bit of house work? yup

but whole day was facing either the com, or the tv, else the iphone...

i find that someone has changed....changed from one whom i thot i knew her quite well (coz we talked alot in the past), till now, almost on the way to being a stranger, or a classmate...

maybe it was me who changed? her? i cant decide. i know i have weird tempers, sometimes get angry over things which people dun think it was worth to be angry with...but that is me... accept it or leave...

yup, people change over time...i do too.

but the question is changing for the better? to become a better fren?

or to change for the worse...to become more drifted from your frens.

its been a long time since i heard anything from her, maybe not exactly long physically, but to me it seems really long...

i have changed, certainly..but i duno if it was a good change. i need my frenz to tell me, whether the change for right or was it wrong to start off with.

is there no long lasting frenship? i believe it exists...

sometimes i am really angry at your actions and the way you talk...but i think that is you, i can only hint you here and there, that "your fren here doesn't like what you said just now, can you please not do it again?" but in the end, you are not getting the hint....so i guess i have to continue...i can only hint, i cant change...coz its you, not something programmed and with just a click and i can change and reformat everything...

empty promises are quite unforgiven, so if you cant fulfil it, dun say it...else you will just hurt someone when she took whatever you said to heart.

2009-08-30T01:07:00.005+08:00

this is the picture i had mentioned in my previous post!

so cute!

maltese:>

loved malteses!!

anyway, just to highlight, i'm so disappointed with myself...so undisciplined.

down with flu again...maybe its just sinus....but i feel my nose gonna drop again!

my parents are like trying to keep emphasizing, i most probably getting chicken pox...

yea, i hope i get it too...get once and over...

dun let it come disturb me when my trip is nearing..i will go mad if that happens!

though still a week later, but i am wondering if i should get a job...during the vacation.

this time round, i'm not that enthusiastic, like last time,in getting myself a part time job.

maybe i should stay home and rest? enjoy my holidays=D

today went out with parents reluctantly. i wanted to laze at home, but bro asked me to help him bring his new bought iphone for servicing...so i'm a good sister....=D

westmall=not able to fix the problem.

so went somerset=problem fixed, a new set exchanged...happy leh

sometimes i find that the roads in sg are really short...i dun like!

i loved to sleep in the car, for unknown reason...

so i dislike it when i get to a place so fast...before i could even sleep for 5 minutes in the car!

or isit just because its my dad who is driving??

2009-08-28T17:42:00.001+08:00

these few days was watching 终极三国...
super lame and funny!
though i know i shouldn't be watching....*ahem*
but it makes my day by making me laugh!
=DD
brother having chicken pox now...one more week, and he should be alright=)
but now i'm afraid! it might be me next...omg...but now dun think so much huh...
going korea this dec holidays...looking forward!
hope its gonna a fun trip...
also, i got rejected for the laos cip trip...
but nevertheless....i'm not exactly sad or anything...maybe just a little?
there are other ways to do cip right? i can do that in sg!...

just hope they have a memorable trip there=)
anyway, i found this cute pic on the net...tada!

(ok, know what....i cant post picture!i forgotD=
next time then!)

2009-08-21T00:30:00.002+08:00

finished prac tests, and finally, hope its a pass.
next up, will be exams...

taiwan, once a nice place, now, certain things are gone.
i heard, the ah li shan, was gone with the typhoon, it needs 4 years and a sum of 1,000,000,000!!!
i was so shocked when i heard that.
kept watching the news, and alot of those news are bad ones...

i remembered taiwan, a nice place...but now they were attacked by something disastrous.
alot of people were helping, even singapore sent something over to help=D

to us, we watch the news, we feel sour.
to them, it means no loved ones, no homes, no schools...just a barren piece of land...

2009-08-14T16:48:00.000+08:00

ok, blogger is getting weirder and weirder...
anyway, done with all the tests this week...but more coming next week and the following week, which is the actual exams...
getting tired...
just saw the taiwanese news about the typhoon. following the disaster in sichuan....i think the environment is trying to get its revenge ya?
more and more saddening news appearing on the news, just makes the heart go sinking deeper and deeper...
its disheartening to see people struggling to survive there in such harsh conditions...like the divers wearing the live jackets, trying their best to save any survivor they find or any corpse they could get...
as the days passed, the chances of finding survivors get slimmer...
those living, with their hearts broken when they realise they had lost a loved one...or have their hearts racing faster than a F1 racer car when there is no news of the ones they loved...those anxiety, worrying, and depression is what we cant experience...because we are living in such a safe place.

2009-08-11T00:13:00.003+08:00

this week, gonna be overwelmed by loads...tests...and the upcoming practical exam.
*sigh*
i promise, after 2 sept, i will sing my guts out! whether is alone or with frenz, i'm gonna hit the KBox room!
hahah...
it's been sometime ago...and i wanna go another time!
fri met up with the usual 4e4 people for kok leong's birthday...was fun actually...even though its just a couple of hours. its really really long ago i have met up with them.
=D
gonna turn in soon soon!

2009-08-05T22:46:00.000+08:00

its so demoralising...the prac tests coming, the tests and exams coming, but i dun seem to have familiarised with my stuff! days passed so quickly that i cant run to catch up with it...
i think alot of problems lie with myself...
so i try to change alright? i'll be more cheerfuland to make friends around me happy as well!
dad and mom says or i should say, considered, going to korea this coming dec holidays!
i hope really can go...its been awhile since i've stepped on board a plane!
and if my parents really agree to go, i will be spending my christmas there!!!! wowowow~ i want! can I???

brocame back from vietnam today, and i went through all the photos he and frens took...eekkk, i saw some gross stuff....
like like...like u know, wine made using snakes? this time there is and extra ingredient! the crow!!! so i went omg!
and the fertilised egg, but they broke the shell before the chick can hatch...eeeww
but there are other stuff like somecute animals from the zoo!

alright! shall stop here...cya!i wanna watch up! anyone interested? =)

2009-07-28T23:14:00.000+08:00

today is yet another disappointment for me, but it guess i'm alright already.
i have got some problems with my laptop which i dunno how to solve...and it is really maddening...
sometimes, bad things come in a chain, and may not even stop unless the worst in the chain comes.
recently i'm getting touchy and may just flare up easily.
when things dun go your way, you get irritated and for me, i'm more bad tempered, so the effect is definitely more...
you may seem to be surrounded by people whom you claimed to be close with, but in the end, when the dark sets in, everything is gone and exposed. finally, at the end of the day, you will still be alone facing everything yourself. fighting to be strong, fighting to be steady, fighting to be back to the real you.

i hate the feeling to be alone...
hate it...as it just fill me with fear...
last night there was a blakout at home and i was all alone in the dark. it was already nine plus, so outside was dark and i was freaked out initially...luckily there was light outside my house, so i just stood there at the door to call my parents. parents not at home, brother overseas...that feeling yesterday when the light went off was really devastating. because i know, even if i cried, no one will come for me...i can only depend on myself, feel around for my phone and switch on the flash light. only then can i see somethings around me, and only then i got a little calmer.

i wasn't daring at all...i'm just a timid little weakling...

2009-07-24T21:33:00.001+08:00

somehow i dunno why, blogger had no bigger box, only this preview box, which is soooo small...
just have to make do with it....

suddenly thinking back to the same old issue...
maybe i was thinking too much, expecting too much...from them...
am i?
i wanted to convince myself that i should not be so persistent about certain things, that they are different from my secondary school friends.
but really difficult, because i don't see why is there a difference...
should i go to the extent that i have to take whatever she say as something that i can forget after hearing? i hope not, but i can feel that i am turning that way...
disappointed is all i can say, and i really dunno how to face them...

2009-07-16T23:42:00.002+08:00

today had a so called fun prac!
clinical optom 1, slit lamp!
13 hours allocated, and today was a start...so what do we do?
had demos etc for the first hour++, after which, hands on to the slit lamp...
it was really cool....to see the eye at like 10x magnification! see the lid margin etc...lift upper and lower eyelid, den hmm, the "fun" come in for today...evert upper eyelid. in simple terms, flip eyelid!
before today, i will get disgusted when i see people flip their own eyelid...but now, i think i wasn't that disgusting afterall...
i was a difficult one coz my lids are a bit tight, and poor szeyin had to try so many times! so demoralising for her! aww...

it was quite fun though, coz we are learning new things!
i hope i can faster learn it well, and not be a blur headed examiner...hopefully...

after the prac, went tuition, and that kid was really hyper!, i get so tired after teaching her...what a 6 year old kiddo...
then went to pass hilary her birthday present which i owed her for like almost 3months?
tmr is gonna be a super long day from 8 to 5...
why cant our fri be a short and sweet one?

anyway, sun gonna watch harry potter and the half-blood prince! hopefully can get tickets...ya know...hmm
that will be after the eye screening in the morning...helping residents to test their eyes? yup hope it's gonna be a pleasant day for all of us girls!

and one more thing, my parents allowed me to go for the cip in laos! i'm sort of happy? but really hope i can go...
gosh i got lots of hopes, but dunno if they turn out good!

2009-07-12T01:07:00.003+08:00

majonged today over at shichieh's place, her place was so neat! ...compared to mine...
i won 3 bucks plus? ha, was so funny throughout the game!
cant use type, but have to say it out, so ask me and i shall say!
was discussing yesterday with ym they all, where t have the next class outing. i suggested going Escape theme park, coz most of us will be able to go, no need stay over night, not much of preparations to do, etc.
so, that could be a place!
the last time i went was year years back, boring!
coz i wanted to try out quite alot of stuff my my cousins dun want!
so in the end, din play much...
some papers were given back, but wasn't happy with my results.
but anyway, that aside, for our itp, which will be during our semester 2 sem hols! 6 weeks! ohmy...
without holidays, its disastrous!
that will be in singapore, but there is this other project which i'm interested in...going Laos for CIP...it was sort of another training for us, just that it will be held during jun next year...which will be during our three weeks of holidays. after which will be mst. which means, no time to study for those tests during for the holidays if i were to go over. that was one element for consideration.
i'm quite keen to go, just that i'm worried my parents dun allow. i wanna try out something outside the "comfort zone" i'm living in now. people might think it is something done to waste their time, but i wanna do that. also, i am also worried i cant get a place. i hope we can all get in, the few of us from my class. coz it will be just a great experience!

2009-07-08T23:23:00.002+08:00

today went over to cousin jessie's place to visit Ariel. den unexpectedly, her fren was there too, with a baby girl, just 5 days younger than ariel!
before i knew she was 5 days younger, i thought she was one year old plus! coz she was already 11++ kg and she is only 10+ months...she was almost 4kg when she was born...
both of them were so cute!!
her name is liv, i forgot she chinese name, but she is really big in size
haha
den followed the two families for dinner at i think is bishan?
not very sure, but is near thomson=D

yesterday started a tuition for a K2 girl, teaching chinese...
they were nice, but i hope they wun be like the other parents, either dun pay on time, or suddenly terminate lesson! so scared!

2009-07-04T01:33:00.002+08:00

caught 3D Ice Age at marina. not bad, but not as good as expected.
anyway, was funny, and PEACH is CUTE!
and its touching, just not enough to move my tears..
so its the end of the MSTs!
so delighting man! though as the same as before, not as confident.
today went to a great place and really, loved it=D
i wanna watch transformers! and harry potter! and up!
bye! happy me now~

2009-06-30T21:00:00.001+08:00

lalala, three papers down, two more to go puls a practical test.
wish me luck! coz i really need it!

2009-06-28T01:35:00.000+08:00

gosh, i think this blog is getting dead...so let me get a post up! went for BBQ yesterday at pasir ris park. super far! so i met colleauges at paya lebar where we cabbed to pasir ris. XiaoMa's mom's squids and stingray were super nice! spicy and i loved it, yummyyyyy
chatted with them alot on some female stuff and met quite a few new faces. initially i wanted to cook, but after a while, it seems that there were MEN there to do the cooking! so i laid back and be served. haha. they look professionsal for BBQ.

had some videos, which should be up on facebook soon....if i have the time to wait for the loading....pictures as well!

after the BBQ, cabbed home, all the way from pasir ris back to my place....jurong! shared the cab with two others living at bedok. so they dropped at bedok while i continued the cab ride. so its from pasir ris to bedok den to jurong. guess how much was the fare? 43! plus midnight charge...though...
but aftersome calculation, my fare was 32...which was alot afterall.
colleague, frederick, passed me 50 bucks and i was shocked...but he insisted so yup, took it. had to return la...but i dunno when! i hope to see them soon soon....

well, after all the misses, it marks the end of my vacation! ohmygosh, that what i can only say now...no more late wake-ups and slacking. and worse of all, MSTs...tests! prac test! i'm so tensed up everytime i think of that. sigh, nothing i can do, so live with it!

for the past 3 weeks, i had been i school for at least 4 days a week? library was quite a condusive place to study! and its alot better than home coz i get distracted really easily...so yaa, hope efforts in studying not wasted!

2009-06-16T01:13:00.004+08:00

yuhuuu i'm back...
shall chop chop start on some stuff
first, start with lunch out with DOPT 2a05 peeps, wangsi/szeyin/lyn/shichieh/tzehoon/doreen/edd/chanwen/chee yang and jorghi
at a jap restuarant for buffet...but think i'm not cut out for buffet coz i get full after all the sushi...
after that, was k box! wonderful!
but the guys did not join us...
sang sang and sang all the way till 7.30?
cool, 5 hoursof singing is taxing to the throat...

next day, off i go to the SPP FO camp!
had night walk and disco night...for both nights respectively...
met alot of nice and fun people there so i totally enjoyed the camp
though i was super tired!
i slept for 18 hours...like uncontrollably?
and lost my voice, so a few of us sounded like same after the camp..

and edd came for the camp!
haha, he missed the disco night lar
disco night was either a good experience or a bad one to me. coz i sort of opened a little and hope secretly that no one knows its me there!
coz it felt so weird...
but it was a good one...successful one
three cheers to organising committee!

after the camp, meet up spp peeps for dinner and got to know more people...the freshies...and i can feel myself getting old...they are 17, i'm 18!
nice to know them really!
and this junior i got....from DOPT!
haha, was surprised to know he was from the same course...

den, sunday, met up with spp peeps to IT fair...but not much cameras...so went to sim lim.
bought a cam! canon ixus 100 yay, happy me now...

shuping also got a new cam=DD

today, went to watch night at the museum 2 with spp peeps...shuping, qingren and meieng
dinner without shuping, but with xinyi along=>

tmr meeting spp peeps to study tgt with doreen and shichieh=DD

realised i kept mentioning spp peeps? its because i had been meeting them everyday since monday! monday all the way till today except for tue which i went out with classmates...

a bit mad i know, but really meet up haha!

i skipped the details cos there are really too much, anything, let facebook pictures do the talking!

2009-06-06T00:32:00.001+08:00

i'm tired of all the tears...
no one is perfect, but i'm not even good...
the accumulation, errupting soon...

2009-05-31T17:49:00.003+08:00

nice talk to shuping and xinyi on fri...
spoke all that was on my mind at that moment..
thanks was all i can say=D

went for lunch with sec 4 clique=DD
though only jingwen and hilary, i was happy enough! with all of them i will be on the clouds! haha
dined in @ tian tian steamboat...was not bad....
super full after that.
i find that when a group of people go for stemboat, the eldest of the group will be the one taking care of everyone at the table. hilary and me was the eldest haha, and really, we kept scooping stuff for jingwen, the youngest of ur group
hope for the next outing! which is 28 june!
after lunch, brenda joined us for a while to walk around at bugis. and we separated at 5 plus.

dinnered with spp peeps at astons, suntec
again, super duper full!

and today!
bought my new phone!
W705
though not C903, i was still very contented=D
still need to explore, coz i've never used their walkman phones before=S
maybe the only bad thing is the camera...only 3.2mp.. but nvm getting a camera soon i suppose?

2009-05-29T01:48:00.002+08:00

i wanna get a phone!
not that ambitious though, supporter of sony ericsson=D
but think i have to get w705?
i aimed for C903!
but its like dunno when launching...getting a new phone before 7 june!!!!
nvm, comfort myself...next time round i will get a better phone! =D

2009-05-26T23:06:00.002+08:00

maybe i was too persistent on the issue..
maybe i was just too sensitive.
but i can't possibly ignore it totally.
i told someone about this, and i cried during the prep camp.
coz i felt it was suppose to be a small thing, yet they were not able to make it.
i do my part, as a friend. but if the end result wasn't what i wished for, then what can i do?
i wished i was that happy-go-lucky, but as a fact, i'm not.
friends come and go, but who will be able to stay and accompany for the rest of my life?
again, i hoped for everything to be back to secondary school days.
when everything was so easy to understand.
i missed the days, missed the laughter, missed the bonds.
all passed and nothing can be reversed.
i should be learning to adapt.
back to it, maybe i was just too sensitive.

2009-05-23T23:19:00.002+08:00

here to start on my 100th post!!!

wowow~ din expect i can blog that much?

back from uncle's house, no cousins at home, only bro and i... so i stayed in the room playing nds=D

basically, today...what i did?

slept through......

was home at about 7 plus...and sleep till late afternoon, ard 4.

super tired...

a night without sleep, it takes some time to get the energy back i guess...for me.

after 4, watched tv and back under my blanket once more! this time till 7!

haha~ a pig i am!

i realise i totally did not sleep for a whole 24 hours? incredible, i haven tried that actually...coz during the trial camp, i wasn't exactly sleepy...

went through games etc and night walk!

went for SP rock climbing club's nightwalk... was in a team with Doreen and qr...ok, the three of us wasn't actually very tough under this kind of circumstance. haha, but qr was nice, haha

anyway, the best thing was that the whole walk for us was not at all scary... simply just walked ard the school....

coz we went to with the wrong route...(the light sticks were misleading, and there are other camps having night walks as well)

so we just skipped a whole lot of the stations...and thus....no scares at all...

maybe the last station was "scary"

we went to sp's red bridge..and guess what we had to do there? go down to the first floor from there...i was like...at night? jump in the dark? where got fun? more scary that is.... in the end, only john, sp, me, and kdrew went for it...i wanted to try, but cant...

coz after a while, alot of people were there....on the brdge...from both spp (but we are in a corner) and sprc...so in the end, we spp peeps went down from the stairs....

also, i suddenly realises someone from spp was someone's lookalike...though he was more aggressive than this fren of mine, but the way they spoke was very alike...

anyway, hope everything will be fine for the actual camp!

2009-05-14T23:46:00.003+08:00

RAHHHHHH!
mad girl on the roll!!!

crazy...
okk, i dunno what to say...
events happened these days, but i dunno how to elaborate leh..
so i shun go into them!

i was watching some taiwanese drama...then i was thinking, if once in a life time...u get a relationship which was really thrilling, creating big woohaa...
wun it be great?

coz this will leave u with nth to regret for the "relationships" category..
i'm making it sound like some kind of contents page....

coz i feel that having a BGR wasn't just like i like u u like me...and that is it. too boring...its like watching an everyday thing, nothing fresh, u can guess what will be happening next!

agree????

but it's gonna be difficult?

i dunno...

dun wanna know...

it should be a hassle...

ha

and and and, i wanna go K
i'm always saying i wanna go K...
its like not enough
midnight K? can i go? hehe, it should be fun u know....sing all the way....yeehaaa! very long nv use this term "yeehaaa"...

wowow~ anyway, we got something weird for Kelvin for birthday!
erm, i guess not nice to type it here...hahaha....hope he can remember these "bunch of kids" =D
he called us that...bunch of kids! i'm 18 already...

and ya, i wanna go donate blood...i cant wait for the day to come...
i'm abit of contradicting myself, i'm super scared of needles, but im gonna have a needle poked into my arm...on my own accord...

Spp camp coming up...! whoops!
excited! meeting on 21st, prep camp 22nd and 23rd, actual camp 10-12 june!
it din not clash with fuhua's dinner...mr chia is the incharge!
=D they go i sure go!

2009-05-03T16:04:00.001+08:00

完美的旋律

第五章

到家后，他坚持要替我包扎，所以，我也不多说，让他进到家里。他把饭放在桌上后说：“ 你家的药箱嘞？” “在那里。”我指向电视机下面的柜子，然后慢慢地走到沙发坐下。他拿了药箱，坐到我旁边。“忍着点，会有点痛。。。” 他边说边打开药箱，拿出消毒药水，占到棉花棒上。我稍微的点了头，伸出手掌让他敷药。哇！还真的好痛！我一直忍，一直忍，尽量不要让他知道我很痛。“好了！记得不要占到水哦，还要每天换药！你还真会忍，很痛但又不说出来，跟其他女生不一样。。。”他把东西收好后，又坐回我旁边。“是吗，还好啦。。。吃饭吧！哦。。。对，谢谢你！” 我把他的饭盒推给他。

饭盒都吃到一半了，我们俩一句话都没说。突然，他开口了：“你的脚，还好吗？要不要我帮你揉一揉，可能会好一点。” “不用了！没事了，真的很谢谢你！” 我急忙地说。“是吗？那好，那么晚了，我也该走了，你送我出去吧！”他说。我一听，马上站了起来，但脚踝的痛实在没办法忍，害得我连站都站不稳，差点就跌倒，还好有亚纶扶着。“看吧，就知道你在死撑！脚痛得话，就让我帮你啊，你的伤是我害的。。。” 我靠着他，又坐回沙发，让他帮我揉脚。他一碰到我的脚，我就痛得差点喊了出来。“你忍一下，很痛就叫出来，我的肩膀让你抓。” 他移了移，让我能抓的到他的肩膀。

他慢慢地揉着，突然很用力的推了一下，我痛得呱呱叫，一看见他的肩膀就用力地抓。过了一会儿，痛消掉了，我也把手松开。“好像真的好多了欸。。。”我看见他手一直抓着肩膀，“喂，肩膀还好吗？我是不是抓得太用力？很痛吗？对不起！对不起！” “没事没事，习惯了，打球的时候经常会受伤扭到脚的，都是我帮朋友揉，不然就朋友帮我，没事的！”我愧疚的看着他，他把手放了下来，说：“真的没事！放心！对了，你家怎么都没人啊？家人都出去了吗？” “嗯。。。”我点头。

突然，我们听到有人用锁匙开门的声音，糟了，他们回来了，如果看到了他怎么办？他们一定会对我问常问短的啦！正当我想把亚纶躲起来时，门开了。老爸走了进来，看着我们。“爸，他是我的朋友。。。” “噢。。。”老爸看似有点惊讶。“伯父，你好，我是琳恩的同学，炎亚纶。。哦。。。这么晚了，我不打扰你们了！我先走了! 明天见！”他转对我说，便走了。

亚纶走了后，我跟老爸沉默了十秒。突然，他兴奋地跑到我前面，问道：“女儿啊，他。。。他是你男朋友吗？” 我还来不及回话，他就继续地说着，“人长得不错，看起来好像很爱玩的样子，但还蛮礼貌的。。。” “他才不是我男朋友嘞！他只不过是我班上新来的转学生罢了。”我不能再让老爸胡思乱想。 “喂，你以为你老爸我没谈过恋爱哦，还狡辩，如果不是男朋友的话，他怎么会在家里出现？这可是你第一次带男生回家哦！” 我听了，叹了口很大的气，“嗨！我怎么会有这样的老爸呢？是刚刚我出去外面卖饭吃的时候，他正骐脚踏车经过，还把我给撞倒了！还说呢，要不是没人陪我吃饭，我就不会搞成这样咯，还得让你误会！也不看看我的伤势！” 我给老爸一个可怜兮兮的脸, 把手上的伤给他看。“天啊，怎会这样！是刚刚那个什么。。。什么纶的吗？臭小子啊！竟然把你弄成这样！我。。。” “老爸！你话变的还真快诶！才刚说人家有多礼貌，一回头就骂他臭小子。。。不是很好哟！我的手没事啦，只是擦破点皮而已。”我笑着说。

-续-

2009-05-03T01:16:00.013+08:00

yo! went punggol beach today for photoshoot. really nice place over there. just with ALOT of rubbish over there! here are some photos which i took. not very nice and the composition was kind of same...haish...improvement! RAH

lovey dovey couple taking their photos for their once in a lifetime shots!

this was taken when the sun is almost setting...

i found a coconut and so took a photo!

gross! took a lot of courage to take this man...dead fish got washed up to the shore. eeks. i dun have a liking toward fishes which are uncooked and alive/dead.

this is fila!!! rolled up her jeans so that she can get down there to the water! for the sake of the phots! haha

this was taken soon after we reached...

emo emo clouds...

i like photos taken diagonally !

shoreline...

first photo of the day..

me and shuping. there are others...shall upload them soon!

the three of us. xinyi shuping and me. holding hands, posing for them to shoot=D

so nice! haven been shooting for some time! got all stinky etc. but had a fun time walking along the beach and taking some pictures of the sun. here are some of the photos...there are others which i had taken, but i lazy to upload all. some not nice for u all to see hehe

anyway, on a random note!

got quite mad at this particular auntie on the mrt on my way to hougang to meet the spp peeps.

i boarded the train at pioneer, got a seat and started reading my book. then in came a group of aunties and there is this super loud one. the moment the door opens, her voice was like so prominent. "eh here got seat got seat! eh leave a seat for xxx! aiya, no more seats...." etc etc. and mind you, she was actually talking ACROSS the cabin can? coz in between there was no seats, only for ppl to stand. she sat beside me and i had to listen to her loud talking. then at je interchange, her fren board the train and as there aren't any seats, she had to seat opposite the loud auntie. they can even talk like this! then the person on my left (the loud auntie sat on my right) alighted. then the loud auntie quickly asked her fren to come and sit. she asked me to move laaar! whoaaaa. alright, i moved. and guess what, she din even say a thank you! omg!

pissed uh!

she was suoer duper loud!!!! argh, dun she know that she can disturb others in the cabin as well??? no manners? omg. she even singing! gosh

she was so oud that i had to put on my earpiece and read. what the hell do this aunties think the are? so inconsiderate...

2009-04-26T16:55:00.008+08:00

! turned 18 already...
some things wanna update... hold on..

this card was from spp friends :D
erm, let me list them? 10 of them...shuping, qingren, john, junhui, xinyi, poosiang, meieng, hafila, yiboon and kelvin
yup and together with this!

a perfume =D
had a nice dinner with them at essential brew and happy to have them celebrating with me in advance!

this was from hilary! yay and i was feeling super baddddd coz i haven got anything for her yet!

omg...chocolates!
went kbox with her, anderson's, and walked and chatted...totally elated to meet up with her, and hope to do so often!

this! was from adrian. notebook from Prints. okie, its not exactly a notebook, more of an organiser. but i seldom use organiser (coz i'm not organised....bleh) so i can use it as a note book!

went out for lunch yesterday with fellow secondary school people...=D
namely xinyi, bren, jw, shu, diona, adrian and kendrik at cathay astons...not bad a lunch and its not ex as well. they treated me and i felt bad coz they already had a present for me....really appreciated it...loves

this! dinner...erm, no its dinner cum supper. with daddy mommy and brother...
went all the way to east coast park to have this...and its yummy yummy yummmmm..
it was on my actual birthday on thursday itself=D

this! is just a casing...with 800 bucks inside.
paid a sum of 800 on two equipments. ophthalmo and retinoscope.
abit heart pain, but still =D

another 135 gonna be gone, but i guess its wirth it...a textbook which contains alot on ocular diseases...FYI, i love to read textbooks...certain textbooks, prior to my own interest! so hope this was one of them!

last thing of this post, thanks for those who wished me, sms-ed me a happy birthday
deeply appreciated that it was still being remembered by u guys!

lovesssss!

2009-04-25T01:32:00.003+08:00

having swollen lower eyelid is annoying. coz somehow, very uneasy without my full scope of vision!
and it was red! omg, i had totally no idea at all why i had this swollen eyelid out of the blue.
dampened my mood to blog D:
tue was no longer a "no break" day for our class, and will be having an relatively early lunch break from 10 to 12pm. and from then, all the way till 5pm is the last lesson.
the start of the semester was kind of uneasy. coz the first day of lesson was practical on one of the "big" modules. and really had our hands on with the equipment.
it feels weird...
and i'm so tired. dealing with several stuff at the same time. but i hope my tutoring doesn't affect my studies. though i'm not good a student.
i wanna get overseas, get a degree overseas. GPA 3.0
i dunno, i lack of confidence. the further i pass through the weeks, the more inferior i get.
i thought i coud do it, but in the end, it just shows it does not.
twice, i get myself deceived by my own actions. i was the one without the knowledge. who can i blame on?
sometimes i dun wanna talk doesn't mean anything, just mere feeling inferior.
u may ask, why feel inferior? you can one la....must have confidence....and so on so forth.

2009-04-19T22:26:00.002+08:00

Was out with Hilary! yay!
it'sbeen so long since i last saw her!
went k lunch, that particular room was kind of weird, coz some of the newer songs cannot be sang! eeks...
so we had to sing those older songs...
after that, went for a walk plus ice cream at anderson's! wowow!
nice man...
this was kind of a pre celebration for our birthdays, but just a meet up can win anything, really.
known her since P4, and its like 8 years? haha
love her loads and not to forget the others! missed them and wish them best of luck for the coming up A's!!!
yesterday went cousin's house, it was like out of a sudden. the frequency that i went to their place was like once out of several years?
neatly kept as usual! again chatted with cousins:D
nothing beats a great chat with them!
and! my niece! love her man! she is so so so so so cute! indescripable is the word!
i didn't manage to catch the ending of the sixth sense on channel 5 last night, coz we left before the show ended...really wanted to know what the ending is like!
but i cant watch it alone, haha
school's starting proper tmr and i wans't excited at all....start the school term at 3?
it's an ohmygosh...

2009-04-19T22:19:00.003+08:00

完美的旋律

第四章

想啊想，走啊走的，一会儿就到家了。回到家，看见两张纸条。一个是老爸早上留的，另一个则是姐留的。

琳茹，琳恩：
老爸今晚得加班，没办法回家做晚饭，你们俩就自己解决了！
老爸

妹：
今天学校里有事，我不能陪你吃晚餐了！你自己到外头吃吧！
茹

嗨，今天没人陪吃饭，　吃什么好嘞？算了，　等会儿在吃，先去睡一下！

啊，真好，睡饱咯！我伸了伸懒腰。快七点了，肚子好饿哦，赶快换件衣服出去买晚餐吧。我换了件帽T后就出门了。很快的，我走到了熟食中心，买了饭后，我便往回家的路走。走着走着，我被一辆骑得很快的脚踏车撞上右手。

我的饭盒掉在地上，饭立都洒了一地。我一屁股地坐在地上，动弹不得。我扭到脚了，好痛！“哎哟！” 我像只受了伤的小狗一样地叫了一声。脚踏车骑士马上停下，好像是走到了我的身边。“对不起，小姐，你没事吧！” 我坐在那儿，一动不动的。真怪，难道是我听他的声音听太多？怎么这男的声音跟他这么像啊！我一转头，天啊！还真是他！怎么这么倒霉？！ “是你！没事吧！” 炎同学伸出他的手，我便靠拉着他，站了起来。他看我站起来后就把手放开。我的脚没了支撑，我就痛得差点跌倒。在我以为自己又得屁股开花时，他抓住了我。“喂！小心！哇噻。。你这样怎么走？是我撞伤你的，就由我负责送你回去吧！上车！” 他细心的扶着我，突然，我的肚子不听使唤的叫了出来。我的脸马上红得像个大番茄！他看了看我，又看了看地上的饭，笑了。“你。。。你笑什么啊！你肚子饿的时候不会叫吗？” 我尴尬的东张西望。“来啦，我请你去吃东西，算是我向你赔罪！” 他把我拉到他脚踏车的后座，看我坐稳后，便轻快的把车骑走了。

他骑车虽然有点快，但是蛮稳的，坐在后面的我，感觉很放心，连脚上的痛都忘了。“到了哦！” 他慢慢的把车停了下来。“就是这家的烤肉饭！好吃的嘞！” 他又把我扶到了店里。我坐在那儿，看着他到柜台点餐。“我帮你点了这里的招牌烤肉饭！” 我点了点头。“谢谢。。。” “不用，对了，脚还痛吗？你还有那里受伤？” 他提醒了我脚上的伤，感觉好像有点痛。我看了看右手掌，这才发现皮被磨破了，流了好多血！我忍着手上的痛，看着他，微了微笑，“没事，手没事！” 他从上到下的打量着我，真让我感觉好不舒服哦。 “是吗？真的？等一下！你的衣服怎么有血? 你的手，我看！” 他硬把我的手翻过来，看见手上的伤后，什么也没说，就走到柜台。不知道说了什么，不一会儿，就会来了。“我叫他们帮我们打包，我先送你回家。这伤口得先处理一下，不然会发炎的。”

我看着他，什么都不说，也很听话的照着他的话做。他拿了饭，又把我扶上脚踏车。“你家在那里，我送你回去，再帮你包扎。你不会介意吧？” 我摇了摇头，说，“没关系，我可以自己来，你已经帮了我很多。” 我把家的地址告诉他后，他便出发了。

-续-

2009-04-17T00:26:00.001+08:00

完美的旋律

第三章

我的目光一直排徊在这些同学的脸上。真好笑！一个个的脸。。。真想拍下来当纪念！我不禁对自己傻笑，就连这位新同学已自我介绍完毕，坐到我旁边的空位，老师以开始讲课，我都皆然不知。回神后的我，没时间反应，急忙拿出书本来。

课才上不到一半，我身边的炎亚纶同学就像坐不住似的，一直不停的动来动去。一下看手机，一会和旁边的同学说话，最后竟转头来想和我说话。我对他使了个眼神，他便很识相的转回头，以背对我。过了一会儿，我发现怎么他一点声音都没有。真奇怪，可当我转过头时，我发现他在睡觉！哇噻！真是受不了！老师在讲课，他不专心听也就算了，反而在这里打瞌睡！真要命的转学生！这种人，就算篮球打得再好，人长得再帅，琴弹得再棒，再好听，都没用！一样是那种只会耍帅，却是幼稚又无聊的小男生！

不对！我干麻这么激动啊？我看是因为今天早上没练到琴，没让自己的情绪好好调整一下，才会这样。一定是，我轻轻的摇了摇头。

呤！

下课的铃声响了。我收拾好东西后，正想出教室时，看见炎亚纶已经在教室外，被女同学们包围。真不懂这些女生欸，为什么要像麦芽糖一样的粘上去嘞？也得怪这位炎同学，第一天来到我们班，就把它搞成这样。我再次的摇了摇头走出了教室。才刚到门口，就听见有人叫我的名字。一抬头，看见他从那群女生中挤出来，走向我。

“温琳恩同学！”　他又给了我他那灿烂的笑容。可他是怎么知道我的名字的？我记得我没跟他提起过啊。他来到了我面前，“可以叫你恩吗？你叫我亚纶就行了！之后这几天就麻烦你咯！先跟你说声谢谢！不如我请吃晚餐吧！走！”　他话一说完就拉着我的手。我吓得赶紧用力的把他的手给甩掉，说：“喂！放开！你在说什么啊！我听不懂，什么之后这几天就麻烦我？又为什么无缘无故的想请我吃饭？更重要的事，我跟你很熟吗？”　我一口气把话说完，有点喘地看着他。而他，又被我弄得呆住了。　“不对啊！刚刚老师不是指定由温同学带我在学校看看的吗？”　他搞不清楚状况。

老师刚刚真的有这么说过吗？但看他的样子应该不是在说谎。　“是吗？我。。。我忘了麻。好，带你到处参观是吗？明天，明天下课后我再带。没事了吧，没事我先走了，拜！”　我话一说完，马上掉头就走。

回家的路上我一直在想我为什么这么倒霉啊！他才来一天，就让我这么烦。。。先是不让我练琴，后是坐在我旁边却又不专心上课，到最后还得我带他在学校里到处走？哇！怎么搞得！不过，说实在的，他弹琴时的样子，真的很迷人。。。

-续-

2009-04-12T02:52:00.004+08:00

today had started the day early....at about 7.30?
yup, lazily, i got up from my bed and then lightheaded, went to wash up and went school...
know why i went back to school? hoho, its because few days back, someone called and asked if i can be the subject for whatever eyedrops? will get paid...then i was kind of worried as i dunno what will happen...
in the end, everything turned out fine! it was just that the lecturers were having this course conducted by eye doctors from TTSH and we students just go there and be the teachers' subjects, that's all:D
been exposed to the various way to check for eye complications, and blah blah blah...
was impressed by the two speakers....they were good and fluent and most importantly, very confident:D
then anesthetic eyedrops onto our eyes, followed by the alkanes (from what i heard from the doctor...) which was to dilate our pupils...some different equipments used...alot more!
after the whole thing, i was like i cant see closer up images with my spectacles on, and i had to take it off...got a scare initially, haha...
anyway, it was the first time, i saw lecturers changed their status to "students" and they were like following instructions given by the doctors and being asked if they were doing fine and all that...seems a little weird though...
after which, back to home and off to uncle's house in the evening.
chatted with cousins, really talked alot more than we did previously...
was really happy...
went for supper, the 9 of us at xin wang:D
felt like i was finally one of them, and hope this feeling goes on and on...
on the way home, i thought of some events that have passed...tears rolled down again, much less this time round. looking back on certain things, and realised that actually i had encountered quite alot. and definitely, grown as well.
just got home and i'm gonna turn in soon!
bye~

2009-04-11T00:25:00.002+08:00

完美的旋律

第二章

妈妈离开了。她输了，输给了命运的安排。而当时的我们三人，忍痛，压抑着自己的难过，帮妈办完丧事。爸爸每天待在家里不出门，还偶尔忍不住地坐在一旁哭泣。我和姐都不知道该怎么安慰他才好。我们两姐妹也好不到哪去。姐姐每天都把自己弄得很忙，上学，课外活动，让他没时间想其他的事。这样，她也就不会想起妈妈。她虽然不曾哭过，也看似坚强，但我知道，她只是在压抑自己，好让我们不担心她。而我，却变得沉默寡言。天天都以弹琴来发泄情绪。我一边弹，一边在掉着眼泪。我把想念妈妈的感觉放在心底，让弹奏出的音乐能帮我表达。

我很害怕。我害怕其他我所爱的人回像妈一样的离开我。

半年，我们用了半年的时间来疗伤。忠于恢复了之前的家。爸爸不再颓废，姐姐不再把自己弄得忙忙碌碌的，而我也不再一泪洗面。大家又开开心心的在一起。

刚走到通往琴房的走廊就听见一首不熟悉的曲子。是一首很凄美的曲子。我听着，脚步缓缓地步向琴房，仿佛如果我的动作太大，便会破坏这完美的曲子。

是位男生。我站在门口觉得很奇怪。这间琴房明明就没有人会来啊，怎么他。。。钢琴声突然停了，我顿时从我的思绪中跳了出来。“对不起！” 我担心是因为我的存在让这位同学不能好好的练琴。“不用道歉。” 他站了起来，看着我。“我是新来的专学生。刚刚早到了学校，发现校务出还没开，就到处走走。不知不觉就走到这。。。 ” “你不必向我解释那么多，不好意思打扰你弹琴，我先告辞了。” 说完，我便转头就走。我听见那位同学在叫我，但我依然没回头。

在学校，我是出了名的酷。喜欢独来独往，很少和别人说话。所以，我并没有能让我吐诉心事的朋友。

今天没办法练琴，又不想这么早进教室，我便漫无目的地到处走。不经意的，我走到了蓝球场。这时的篮球场一个人影都没有，安静得很。早晨的风很凉，冷风打在脸上，控气中飘着莫名清新。我把外套拉紧点，让自己暖和点。突然，我看见有人也走到了篮球场。是他，是琴房的那位同学。他手上拿着篮球，一站到球场上就动了起来。不论是篮板球或三分球，对他来说都是轻而易举。看他打球的样子好像是在自己的世界，不需要理会别人，只需要自己开心自在。看着这样的他，让我想起自己在弹琴时也是如此的自我陶醉。

过了一会儿，他停住了。他似乎又发现了我的存在，走了过来。“是你！” 他的笑容很灿烂。“嗯。。。”我点了点头。他很自然的坐到我左边的空位。 “你好！我叫炎亚纶！” 我低下了头，看见他伸出来的手。我转过头看着他，再看了看他的手，说：“对不起，我得去上课了，再见。” 我大概是把他吓傻了吧，因为当我回头看时，他依旧伸出手，愣在那儿。

我很快得到了教室。里头已经有同学到了，正打闹着。我和往常一样，默默地走到我常坐的位子，拿出书本来看。不久后老师进了教室，他清了清喉咙，说：“各位，请大家回到座位，老师有话要说！” 同学们听了都听话的回到位子上，而我也乖乖地把书收好。“今天，我们班来了一位新转学生。同学，你可以进来了！”老师走到门口说道。新同学走进了教室，我看呆了。又是他！第三次了！这是我在一个小时内看见他三次！真邪！我望了望其他同学，仿佛在他们头上看见了一个个白色的泡泡，里面写着：好帅哦！。。。那迷人的眼睛！。。。什么跟什么嘛，他人的确是不错看，但大家也不至于要看他像看到宝石般，眼睛发亮吧！

-续-

2009-04-10T13:57:00.002+08:00

yo! had been lazy to blog hehe...
anyway, some things to highlight, mom's birthday, Brenda's birthday and remind me what else!
mom's birthday coincides with brenda's, which means their bithdays fall on the same day! mind you, and this time, it falls on a friday where mom need not work, and students can spend the day out! so saddening, and i had to choose to celebrate with family! i cant just have both!
then that aside...
and went KBOX (finally) with adrian...okie, he sing well when he wants...but when he juat wanted to be funny, he sings really funnily.. he can hit quite high pitches! envy envy!
sang for 4 hours! at marina...wondering, when can shu join us uh?
and! wang si is back! haha!
dunno why, but this time really a bit miss her!
i seriously need to go on a diet! but but, how????
mouth itchy itchy and alot will go down tomy stomach. and there, the fatty bom bom!
ARGH>>>

2009-04-03T00:09:00.000+08:00

完美的旋律

第一章

温琳恩：20 岁，宜化大学音乐系。（我）
炎亚纶：20 岁，宜化大学音乐系。

“叮咚！”
“门铃响了！快去开门啦！”大姐从房间喊了出来。“叮咚！” 铃声再次响起。“来了。。来了！” 我慢慢，没精神地走向大门。我看也没看是谁就把门打开。。完了。。
“啊！” 叫声是从外面传来的。
我被他的大叫一声，突然回过神来。
“什么事？” 我问。“你。。你。。干麻把脸涂成这样啊！想吓死你老爸我哦！早知道叫你们开门会被你吓，我就自己开了！” 爸爸说。
“ 哈哈！老爸，你也太没胆了吧！对了，别弄我笑！这个新买的黑炭面膜一笑就会长出皱纹的！” 我扬起脸，手摸着脸上的面膜说道。 “才管你脸上的东西嘞，我买了你们俩姐妹爱吃的寿寺。赶快来吃吧！” 老爸把买回来的东西放在桌上后便走进厨房。
“来了！没什么事比吃sushi 更重要！” 大姐从房间冲了出来。
“你们先吃吧！我扶完面膜后就来。” 我边说边走向沙发，躺下，闭上双眼。

隔天早上，我和往常一样，提早一个小时到学校。从柜子里把今天上课得用到的书本拿齐后，便往一个很熟悉的地方走去。那就是学校里的琴房。那里很少人会去，因为大家都到了新的琴房，那里地方较大，钢琴又都是新的，所以这间旧琴房便成了我的密密基地。

我很爱弹钢琴。记得小时候学钢琴是被爸妈逼的。刚开始，我觉得上琴课是一种哲磨，但日子久了，学着学着，我渐渐地对钢琴产生了兴趣。直到现在，我可说是不能没有钢琴。爸妈说家里大家都是学音乐长大的，所以，我也当然不例外。家中，音乐造诣很高的就是姐姐。她很喜欢拉小提琴，更是大提琴高手。老师们都以她为荣。

这么多年来，钢琴陪着我走过了很多。它是我表达一切感觉和想法的管道。不论是开心或难过，都是它替我分担。更重要的事，它让我渡过了生命中的一大难关。

那年的冬天，我十三岁。其他孩子们都在享受着冬天凉快的季节，而唯有我们一家正在面临着生离死别。妈妈躺在病床上，身上插满了管子。她的眼睛是紧闭着的，身体是逐渐在退温的。“癌细胞扩散得太快，我们实在没办法控制，真得很抱歉，请你们节哀。” 这句话，我记得一清二楚。那时妈妈的血癌复发，因癌细胞很快的扩散到其他身体部位，到最后，连医生都没办法治。

-续-

2009-04-01T23:37:00.002+08:00

this is the story I'm currently working at now....
titled Naive
this is the very first part of it...

"Girl ah, now you are having your holidays so what are your plans? i suggest you better go find a job because i see you facing the computer EVERYDAY! Bills need money..."

"oh then too bad, i tried finding but simply couldn't find one that suits me(give a wide grin). So you will have to bear with it!” I said and turned back to face the computer screen.

"Forget it. Talking to you will make me want to faint." Dad shook his head before heading for the door.

The next day, I was surfing the net when I heard my room's door open.
"Girl! Know what, I got you a job. It's at my friend's company. Going there to do part-time is definitely better then you staying at home or going out with your friends!"

"Dad! You didn't ask for my opinion!” I protested and meanwhile mom walked into the room. “You can’t make the” she closes the door after managing to push me into the bathroom. “decision for me!!! Argh! Fine!" I grumbled but I knew what ever I say isn’t going to change anything anyway. So grumpily I went for a bath.

"That should be the way to deal with this little princess of ours...” mom grinned to her husband and closed the bedroom door behind her. The both of them nodded and went down the stairs for breakfast.

The three of us sat in the car with me staring out of the window all the while. I was wondering why my parents were just so keen on sending me to work and refusing to let me stay at home. I may be facing the computer everyday, but it’s not like my family can’t afford the bills…

"Baby, later give your best behavior. He's your dad's friend for many years, you know." Mom noticed the silence in the car and was the first to break the ice.

"I'm sure she will! She's the best to us!" Dad carried on.
"Not to worry..."I replied with eyes still fixed out of the window.

After arriving at the car park of the building, my parents quickly got out of the car, opened the door for me and each on one side, held on to my arms. “Mom! Dad! I will not run ok?” “Not ok! We are your parents! We know what you will want to do next. Your promises are difficult to keep isn’t it? We have to do the precautionary...” Mom retorted in another beautiful grin which makes me realize that again, I can only go according to what they said and strictly no bargaining.

"Come baby" was the last thing I had heard from my mother and off we proceed to the building.

-to be continued-

2009-04-01T22:55:00.002+08:00

weee, first thing first....it's april fool's day!
so first thing, wished a sort of friend of mine...the lady whom i always to go for my haircuts etc...today is her birthday:D
then, to school for badminton! wahhh good man...though there were people there, but still the six of us (Shichieh, tzehoon, yumin, szeyin and lyn) played for quite long and acheived something...haha!
its nice to sweat alot alot coz it means one thing...you exercised alot...and burnt off some fatttts!
after which, when we were on the bus...we thought of something for this april's special day...and that is to prank call our classmate!
siling was the victim and guess what ym told her? we ganged up a story saying we had to change our class and we all ended up in different classes!
ym had to do the texting coz she was the class rep hehe
in the end siling believed and yup, felt a little bad about it...hahah
but cool neh....prank call others...
:D

2009-03-31T10:45:00.003+08:00

it's him lo...haha okie, not exactly really really really crazy about him, but ya, like him alot...
most importantly...he plays the piano...flute...haha!
i think he is good looking...=D

2009-03-30T00:20:00.002+08:00

hello!
today was supposed to pass the dvd to adrian...but really, i'm the muddlehead man! to think that i am meeting him to pass him that and i can forget to bring that! ohmygod...so ya, he had to come meet me again tmr!
den after lunch with him, i went to meet spp friends for shuping's birthday celebration. =D
was supposed to give her surprise...but ya, she too clever to be tricked.
bought her a cake(chocolate!) and a red wallet!
the cake was like so nice lar! i ate it even though i got a bad sore throat..hehe
and watched movie as well, slumdog millionaire. not bad a show...haha

i'm broke i'm borke i'm broke!
goshhhh, hate it...
i'm like forever broke...WHY!!!
tmr to shichieh's house hehe, for mahjong....
superb long din play that...looking forward to that though haha=D

anyway, i just wanted to ask something...for those who read my blog...
i wanted to post my stories up here for my friends to read. but if i do so, will you guys read? i'm wondering...haha
i'm not trying todo anything, just that i wanna write something, den you all read already give me comments on it...
its not completed up to date...but i will try to okie...
i have two on hand now, one eng and one chinese=D
hehe, leaving now!

and shit, i'm like crazy for this guy haha! ya totally crazy....a taiwanese celebrity...he is so charming...guys who knows the piano is just so mesmerising...isn't it? somemore he knows flute...ohmy...lalala

2009-03-28T23:34:00.004+08:00

arghhhh!
ask me to scream now and you need not cover your ears....coz no sound will come out...
ohmygod...
pek chek lar!
when i listen to songs, i have a habit of singing and now....i cant i cant!!!
grrrr...can tell me why i lose myvoice?
its like out of the blue?
no symptoms before hand!!!!
why why why???
the doc prescribed lozenges....pleaseeee its no use...even though its nice to suck=S
and and and, my voice is so bad and unpleasant, even to my own ears.
i cant talk too much, elsemy throat hurts...that is hor-ri-gi-ble!

2009-03-24T22:23:00.002+08:00

heya!
back here again!
i wanted to sleep, but couldn't get to, so here i am blogging.
today woke up with a slight headache but went ahead with the trip to bukit timah hill for a hike.
didn't walk much due to the rain, somemore had to wait at the hut for the huge huge rain to subside.
in the end, after i got back home, i fell asleep...my head was like throbbing.
laugh, head action too big or cough causes my head to thud.
unbearable...
got a scare from my thermometer... it reflects 39.7 the last time i took my temperature. but went i went to the doc's, it was just a slight fever.
mom dad and bro were laughing at me....hmph!
had to take medi and go to sleep! i hope i could.........=S

2009-03-14T01:32:00.003+08:00

80th post...
it's been awhile since i really sat down to blog...
alot of things happened, but i dun feel like elaborating. some things are just not for talking, instead, it's needed to be experienced...
i wanna learn keyboard. i was kind of regretful about me rejecting an opportunity to learn piano when i was young. really regretted. but come to think of it, i was not to be fully blamed on, coz my cousin was just so scary the moment i thought of her gonna teach me piano.
i need to get myself alot of stuff, but recession? internal one? haha, but i no money to be spender in a mall...
today went josephine's house for manicure with ym, sy, asy, lyn, sc, th....erm, almost professional kind...haha!
so now, i have purple nails!
ate alot at her place, and felt really SINFUL....though i always am.
next, to IT fair with shuping and fila....went walking around, collecting brochures which all in the end was housed into the dustbin by me!
many many many people!
at city hall....down the escalator from raffles city....crazy man....only see heads of most people...
ya, the clumsy me back in action again.
i tripped and got myself yet another wound....this time...was painful...but was definitely tolerable=D
and and and....i dunno, somehow got common things within me and fila...haha!
next was supposed to be home but met nicole, her bro and a pri sch schoolmate...
so popped by with them to MAC but i dun put anything into my mouth...cheers!
so here i am, done with my bath, mask, wondering if i should get in bed soon?
wee, shall end here, remind me to blog....coz i really forgot i have such a thing named BLOG...=S

2009-03-04T22:09:00.003+08:00

wee!

back from chalet!

chalet at costa sand sentosa was really really ggggreat!

though not all of the class turned up, but wasn't a flop aint it?

first time to that chalet and find it really very small...but quite cozy!just that the toilet in the guys room is clogged...and it looks.....eeek?

too few guys and we girls way outnumbered them so no way are we gonna let them have the whole room to themselves!

first night din sleep much, and was not even on the bed to sleep. i was sleeping at someone's butt la...couldn't be bothered so i just sleep hoping he wun be so bad to let a fart out. =Ssecond night five of us squeezed the two single beds, sleeping horizontally.

was really funny and laughed like mad before really falling asleep.

i slept in the middle and i somehow slept quite peacefully..haha, just not better than wangC.

but this chalet really make time for us to know each other better i guess?

we were talking and talking at night and laughed together.

we even had forfeit for the guys! haha!
was quite bad la, but they were nice and gentlemen! (we din make them forfeit on purpose though...so should be we girls were lucky than the guys!)=D

enjoyable~

2009-02-25T23:29:00.003+08:00

AHHH!
i wanna scream now you know, its finally over, exams all over!
now nothing can be done or change anything, so simply means i can do nothing!
sosososo, i shall place my mind on other things. likeee upcoming chalet?
hees, dunno why, but i look forward to it!
coz its DOPT 1B 05 first chalet okay.
we thought of a lot thigns to do, play, eat!
2nd to 4th at sentosa!
so today went out with Yumin(hey i almost typed Yumi!), Szeyin and WangC(wangsi).
first to lakeside near fuhua to eat the so called nicest ban mian haha. i think we think its best coz we got used to the taste not that its taste was really superb. but i really like the yi mian down there. yummY!
n i waited for them forrrr 40min? ym waited longer heee.
next to SPGG for bowling, jeez=D
this time i not last out of us four hehe, thanks wangC.
today's weather is super duper warm la, sweat like leaking tap....
after two games of bowling went IMM Giant to walk walk, check out the prices for the things we had to get for the BBQ, so that we dun over exceed budget...
slowly the time ticked and ticked by, it 6 plus so we sat down to calculate the prices and really, our budget rather tight uh. but everything shall turn out alright=D

anyway, the start of 2009 was unusual for me i think, coz i was in a different studying enviroment, where my school term had not end when it was the start of the new year. everything feels so different. alot of things happened, be it among friends or my family. i took things from a different angle. and realise alot of things was superficial and to really see the inner part of it, we had to encounter alot to know. but i know, when i feel scared and helpless, i can turn to some people where they can stay by me, give me a pat on the head to tell me everything will be okay.

one has to grow up, nothing can stay the same. something really dramtic can happen to you, but realise something, the world still goes round, the day still get engulf by the dark. the night still ends with the sun shining over you the next morning.

however, if one really feels depressed, cry is just the remedy. let the tears run. let emotions get control over for once. i thought i can hold it in but that can never really happen, coz it still fell when i saw them. its just happens so naturally, thus dun be stubborn thinking that you can control everything happening coz you cannot. tears had to fall when the time comes, but hold it there when the time is not ripe.

i'm learning and slowly is achieving what it should be.

2009-02-18T18:22:00.003+08:00

Rawr!
hello, today was the second paper down!
what's next?
study for the last TWO papers!
wowee~

u know u know, singing is the best thing in the world! haha, second for me...is exciting rides!
i wanna go amusement parks! where i get to ride all sorts of rollar-costers! provided i have someone to accmpany me coz definitely, i'm not going up to the monstrous seat all alone!
all u have to do is to take a deep deep breath...., pull your courage from its hiding place, sit gently onto the seat of the ride, close ur eyes, put on any safety belts provided, and YOUR READY to GOOO!

finally the next thing is to scream scream and SCREAMMMMM~~~
else u will suffer from internal pressure or injury haha!

it is gonna be difficult i know, but it will be fun, coz you never know what will happen unless you try and experience it yourself!

i dunno why i'm writing this, but that is simply what i'm thinking right now and this particular moment.

Valentine's day no, the day after that is on sunday, went out with dearest frenz. SHURONG, BRENDA, JINGWEN! xinyi and hilary was not able to come....which is an extremely sad thing!

swensen's lunch, dessert, gift exchange, walk walk, bought yet another tee together, trained to jp.... all these little little events, shall all be chained together, one by one and kept, inside my heart.

i really really hope we can stay as frenz together forever. i once thought if i am in college with you guys, how will it be like? will it be better or will it be worse?
i dunno the answer to that, but i am some sort happy to stay like as it is now. though i cant see you guys everyday like before, but still keeping in contact.

i am trying very hard not to be have a regret like before. i dun wanna be crying coz i lose some important people, but i wanna have tears which are falling coz i'm happy to have these important people by my side.

i may not be a sensitive fren, but i am really glad that i had frenz like u all.

to me, you all are just like my family members, not able to lose, and i cant afford to lose you all.

2009-02-11T22:55:00.002+08:00

i know i should not be thinking of this at this time, but....
i will keep thinking of you, you, you, you and you every now and then!
sunday...i hope can go out uh, coz i had such a weird feeling that parents wun allow?
pray hard pray hard!
my girls from 4e4'07! i wanna go on a trip with u all! hehe, very random i know.
last night, i tossed to and fro in my bed and just cant get myself to fall asleep.
i thought of going on a trip....free and easy or backpacking.
it will be such a real interesting experience!
i had thoughts as suggested. haha!
i thought of several countries to go to, to japan, aussie, new zealand, ETC.
thoughts are easy coz just daydream will do. but when putting it to reality, many things need to be considered. like money, need to do homework about the countries, preparation!
it will be a dream come true!
when will we 6 not short of 1?

2009-02-08T12:58:00.002+08:00

tmr marks the end of Chinese New Year! aww~
these fifteen days are too short!
yesterday relatives came over for dinner and my mom prepared steamboat! plus a BBQ stove? or i dunno what is that called...
eat very little lor, cos i cant sit there and eat from start to end right?
hee, exams coming, and left one more test to be down on wed. ocular physio.
patho test was terrible coz i have got serious mental block, and now all i could hope for is to pass the test, and need not forward that module! D=
now i need to finish RWP report writing and study for my test and exams!
jiayou to all who are having or going to have tests and exams..!

2009-02-03T19:01:00.002+08:00

Wella, gonna study for the test tmr soon soon.

New year was half way through, or gonna be over soon?

the previous post was bad...

but now, everything was back onto the right track again!

new year was aweaome. last week everyday i was to visit some relatives!

though reluctant, but i still went along.

hey hey, not that i'm being mean, not wanting to visit them, but really, sometimes i just have nothing to say to them and i will be sitting there doing nothing.

but angpaosss wowowow~

hee and of course, gambled. without fail!

was fun man!

hehe~

i shall start saving for many stuff!

like erm, a new phone, but i dun think i can get myself a nice and expensive one coz it will just be pathetic in my hands.

and a camera, digital one i mean

i know i said many, but i cant think of anything now!

heh, so shall abruptly end here!

byeee~

o.o

2009-02-01T23:42:00.002+08:00

so long, yet to update a post.

done with most assignments, left with a rwp report.

i dun wanna go to school.

i feel myself so random.

happy and laughing and disturbing people at this moment and seating at a corner refusing to talk the next.

running our of time, for my tests and exams.

i want to shut myself up and away.

tears can help but rolls down, wetting my bolster on my lap.

listening to sad songs. dunno what on earth am i here for.

2009-01-24T00:46:00.002+08:00

hi people!
here is a new update on what i had done today!
i had practical today....and its on DISSECTION!
wowow~
dissect what?
PIG's eye!
omg...i was disgusted initially....but but but it was fun okie!
it really looked pretty gruesome when i watched the teacher doing the demo.
snipping, cutting and pulling etccc.
i didn't dare to touch it at first, so i left it there on the chopping board where yumin left.
but i saw all my classmates started their hands -on, so of course i have to do it....since its already there...
it was difficult to hold it in place when it is on the chopping board so i just took it in my hand(with gloves)
so i oso start snipping snipping snip...and i wun go into details uh....i will say when i am face to face with u all uh!
haha.
i told my family about it...and they went like 'ewww'
especially my brother....he is scared of pig's eyes when he can handle stuff like arms in army? haha guess i was like him before i had the courage to dissect the eye...
but its really amazing to really look at the inner part of the eye at close up views! like the lens, vitreous, cornea, iris etc.
haha
lala~

2009-01-23T00:23:00.004+08:00

Counting down! 3 days to Chinese New Year!!!

okie, I'm kinda bashed by erm, tests and assignments?

lala!

but I'm sure, very fast You will see me enjoying my holidays liao...wahahaha

Gems hor...i really dunno how i should do it...

i die die wanna use that idea...but it seems a mission impossible?

where to find old couples? erm i mean have lar, but they willing to let me take pictures of them?

randomly, i cut my hair! for those who dunno haha.

i am said to look even more kido in it!

dunno if i should be happy to hear that..haha...but its always good to be young!

yesterday i was on the bus...

then i felt really really bad...

coz i was sitting down.....

okie it was like that.....

i board a bus. was standing initailly but i saw a seat so i went to sit down. the seat was like 4 in a row along the window kind...not the two by two one...

so beside me was a mother and her daughter.

then a pregnant lady board the bus.

i was supposed to be the one giving up my seat.

in the end is the mother and her daughter beside me who stood up to let the pregnant lady sit.

throughout the journey on the bus, i feel like having a hole where i can hide inside.

felt so helpless and coward and weak.

i dunno, but i just feel so bad about it.

i eanted to stand up, but my butt just dun listen to my brain...

so i stay stuck onto the seat.

another incident. i feel so useless too.

was on the MRT.

it was a little cram but i mange to have a space for me to lean on next to the door.

after some time, when the train went underground, a lady ard her 20s or early 30s was not feeling well.

i knew it coz she was very pale and suddenly she squatted down holding on to the handle.

No one, including me, care about her. they just look at her and then treated that they didn't see anything.

whilst i stood there. i reached for my tissue when i saw her sweat.

but again, i stood there.

looking at her all the while.

until sometime later another lady finally asked if she was alright. and coincidentally, someone got off the train and she could get her seat.

really i felt so useless at that point of time.

i was thinking, why am i not doing anything?

why am i just standing there and staring at her and holding my tissue paper?

it's not like the tissue paper can fly over to her on its own.

she looked so pale and sick.

but there is something i was pissed. (though i count myself same category as them)

those sitting down....they did not bother to give up their seat to her!

anyway, really sad to say, i am not a good person...

2009-01-21T22:53:00.002+08:00

here is the 70th post!

well, it really occurs to me that maybe everlasting love and responsibility were all meant to be kidding. like i mentioned in the previous post, i said there will be some old couples that are able to live till ripe old age TOGETHER.

but now i feel, it seems difficult? Or rather, impossible?

Males and females come from different planets. putting them together is just like "sun crashing earth" or 火星撞地球...

after the honeymoon period, there will be love...then responsibility....then irritation...then bickering...then quarrels...then more and more furious quarrels.

there seems no end and no point in them together, so they will decide that they separate.

that's when alot of people will suffer.

well oh well, getting mundane man this post!

but me not in mood neither.

so byes~

2009-01-16T22:52:00.002+08:00

today went for GEMs and was asked to think of an idea of our photo essay.
it was suppose to be drawn out as a photoskateboard if i'm not wrong...i forgot the name!
we girls skipped the previous lesson and was not known to this thingy, so we had to think on the spot.
but the lecturer wasn't that bad, coz he left us the last to say out our ideas.
before it was my turn, i thought of my own idea.
suddenly, i thought of something.
a granddaughter, who is very close to her grandparents, always hear the love story about the old couple. one day, on the anniversary of her grandparents, she decided to give them a present. so she thought hard, thinking and piecing the lovely moments that her grandmother had described together.
and blah blah blah...
"is there everlasting love?"
i dunno about it, to the fact that i had been single for 17 years.
but from what i can see, alot of them dun survive and ended up with an unhappy ending.
of coz, those honeymoon feelings do not last forever. what i believe is that its not love that holds the relationship, but is the responsibility that both felt for the other party.
this kind of sense of responsibility comes naturally but only to some couples, else how lawyers earn from cases of divorces?
i imagined and dreamt of old couples walking in a park, hand in hand, side by side.
however, it doesn't happen often.
i seldom see really loving 70-80 years old grandparents do that.
and i felt nice when i get to see that.
we always have an illustration in our little minds on how things should work, but most of the time in reality, not much falls into the sequence.

wells wells, i just came back from the supermarket!
at around 10 plus, my mom asked me to go to fairprice xtra with them.
i was lazy initially, but i went eventually coz how could i reject my mom lehhh?
though it was alredy so late, there were still loads of people in there.
aishhhh~
i thought there wun be so many people and i was quite fed up while pushing the trolley, coz almost everywhere i went was jammed!
grrr~
we spent like 150 bucks?
ya, its a bad move from my mom to insist on me going with them to SUPERMARKET.
coz i will lose control and buy loads and loads of things, WITHOUT THINKING.
haha!
so now, here i am posting and sleeping soon soon!
nights people!

2009-01-14T22:58:00.004+08:00

aishh!
i'm feeling very lerthagic!
if i could only be a baby...
i know, saying this..u may think i'm being a kid, still refusing to grow up.
but wun you feel that way too?
wanna stay young like forever?
babies have no worries, just live life as it is.
no need to think so much, leave everything to the adults.
be selfish but wouldn't even be reprimanded.

anywayss, the presentation was over!
ohmy, phew!
i still need lots of improvement, but yea, over already.
but there will be more to come!

i've been writing a story, not that i ran out of ideas, but it's still not good.
i mean, i had been reading books, but the structure, just dun match....
i cannot really write long paragraphs!
eeks!
vocab-goner-me!
aishhh!
rah!
i shall finish the whole plot, before i get it out again for editing.
i hope it is not categorised under "mundantory" section.
else i will cry!
blehhh!

Tuition Peeps...

2009-01-11T23:09:00.003+08:00

miss them! =(

have a bet and i will win now.
bet= now i so relaxed, tmr presentation will be goner.
see? i will win!
i'm sure to be so nervous that i can cry man!
feel like dying now..
right, this experiment was an easy one and was done ages ago, and i should be very familiar.
but! now is presentation!
freaking me out after that trial last week. disaster.
i still remember the first time i had presentation.
was so scared that i shivered!
diediedie!
hope i can get to sleep today...
calm down....
nights~

2009-01-10T23:30:00.004+08:00

this pic was taken at haji lane if i'm not wrong, one of the grafiti on the walls but this was at one of the shophouse windows=)
CIP for our character development!
fun was the word....
guess the best part will be us singing a song to the residents together as a class!!!
wowow~ incredible man!
and wanting....cool girl!
she plucked up courage to hold the microphone and sing, with the rest of us as the chorus=)
some residents clapped along and i dunno why....i felt so happy.
maybe everything was considered better than before. when i first visited another nursing home. they, i would say, is more difficult to take care. though i visited that home for twice, i still cant overcome my barrier. i will still show that i'm afraid of them. but now this time, i'm not scared, i even made an effort to talk to them! improvement acheived indeed...=)
they were nice to be with...they will try as they can when we requested for them to clap along the song to enjoy the moment.
some of them remained cheerful and i think that is what all of us can learn form them--stay cheerful no matter what happens as nothing can be that bad.
there was a female resident, she was quite agitated and requested we leave the place.
we cant say that she was trying to be mean. on the other hand, i feel she was feeling lonely and in her heart, maybe she wanted so much to be surrounded and talk to other people. what i felt was that she was kinda left there by her loved ones and they din visit her often. so when people visit her, she will think that they are hypocrites and refuse to be friendly to us. that is was i think, but who knows the real side of the story?
i guess no one changes, either for the worst or for the better, unless under much stress.
this trip there was not futile, but instead it was great!

and, open house @ sp
last day!
morning shift...din help much...coz i kinda really noob at IT...teach me something and i take ages to rmb the steps to it and do it correctly eventually.
after moving the things from the club to the booth, the printer cant print!
gosh right...but after that, probelm was solved....not by me but by jasmine. without her, i guess i will panick like hell!
alrighto~ all over wowow~ tmr is gonna b sunday!
another sleep in day...and work to do tmr!
i shall go the bathe now!
cyas people!

2009-01-09T22:07:00.006+08:00

my niece!! 5-6 months old =) ARIEL
tralalas~
true enough, yesterday was home at ard 10 plus and that is possible coz my dad fetched me from yew tee!
if not i will reach home even later!
my student was quite well behaved as he knows i'm sick.
he even asked me to go see a doc! should i say he is quite sweet though sometimes abit unbearable? hahas
he even offered me a box of tissue coz i finished my packet.
haha
he quite give me face la. and i use my nose to "threaten" him...saying i made an effort to go teach him, so he must do his homework properly! he promised, but dunno if he will keep it
haha
after tuition i went to a coffee shop to get some packets of tissue to emergency...in case my nose gets worked up again..
and a packet of milo. but i was rather dumb...
the coffee shop was quite near the mrt station and i still bought a HOT milo....i should have bought a warm one lar...in the and i still threw it away...cos its really very hot that i even got my tongue scalded! so i drank a little before throwing it away....=(
today was a nice day i suppose?
ermmmm
one hour lesson and off we go to have presentation discussion!
and chatted....
and yar!
today was pissed with someone~
she was really rude can? she rejected my friend like without even looking at her? how good mannered is that? i dislike poeple like that. even if she was rushing for time, she should at least stop for three seconds and say her words properly. 3-4 secs...and she cannot afford it? i dun care if she heard me...i'm not even acquainted with you. i need not care what you will think of me.
urgh...

another other side, i got my formal suit for my presentation on mon!
hurray!
i look really like office girl lar
but who cares? presentable can liao...=)
the sales girl was nice! pleasant looking and approachable, will give suggestions...she told me to wear straight skirts for presentation..haha
nice lehhh

tmr, going to school for open house...i think i am a slacker there lo...doing little down there..haishhh=(
then after that, heading to bedok! for CIP at one of the elderly nursing home...change bedsheets! ohmy, but 20 of us changing bedsheets? so many?

and! omgomgomg!
presntationnnnn~ hate it scared of it, u name it!!!!
presntation=i dunno it, it dunno me!
like that die le la!
i dun dare to even think that i will have to present..but luckily, it will only be infront of the girls and the lecturer...so i guess not tt bad? blehhhh hope for the best lor!

ya i think people really look different in different clothes la. especially formals and uniforms...

guys, no matter how ugly(i'm NoT trying to be mean here, but merely stating the truth!) will look nice in uniforms(uniform groups uniform i mean...ie RC la, NCC la, NP la etc etc.=))

formals! today saw thosee year 3s wearing formals, with ties and ladies as well. they look charming, smart and beautiful for the ladies! cool!

saw someone with formal today...smart and handsome! haha=)

cyas people!

2009-01-07T23:25:00.003+08:00

ah choo!

had been sneezing since i was out of my bath just now.

omg, i hate it.

sneezing non stop is torturous.

and now, myeyes...puffy and sleepy.

i needa sleep soon coz tmr i will be a whole day OUT!

8-3 lessons

3-6 open house

7-8.30 tuition

and i will be home till earliest 10!

14 hours of work....

maybe not as taxing as working more hours at my parent's stall but... ya..haha=)

formal wear!

i have presentation on mon and need to wear formal!

i shall get my mom to go shopping with me on fri evening!

hope she is free~ so i no need pay

wahaha!

*claps*

goodnight everybody!

right right right!

today i was very mean la....i din go for the talk on the equipments that we need to buy in year two.

so sorry to ym, sy and ws. =(

but on the other hand, i was happy to have watched PONYO meet up hilary!!

of coz the others la!

muacks to them all.

starting school soon for them and that means so much less time when we can meet up!

we all lived on the same side of SG but seldom meet up...

anyway,

oops! this one no shuzzz! wakekes~

2009-01-06T23:50:00.002+08:00

people!

how are you guys?

know what? on my way walking back home from the bus stop, i saw a lot of roaches!

dead, alive, big, medium, small, crashed, u name it....

omgomgomg!

i'm feeling totally disgusted...

imagine having to see a cockroach after every few steps u take....

urgh!

i bet someone out there is having a killing roaches campaign of something, else where will these dead roaches come from??

this is the second time i see so many roaches at one time.

the previous time was when i was in secondary school. walking from school to bus stop with hilary and *poof* all the cockroaches are practically laid on the ground!

eeewww grooosss is what you will say wun you?

some are still not dead! still crawling!!!

omgomgomg!

i'm so dead am i?

2009-01-05T00:51:00.003+08:00

people!

monday coming again...

sobx, the weekend is gone again!

weekends always take some time to come, but it always pass with a *shiu!*

heve you guys gotten everything needed for CNY?

I think i have already done so, but will see huh?

if i go shopping again before CNY and if i have money to spend!

now i will learn to be thrifty!

unbelievable? 50 50 lar.

wed going out with the girls again!

woohoo, yeehaaaa!

shall see more of them now, before their school start proper.

when their lessons start, all i can do is wish them all the best.

maybe u think its too early, but i tell u. very fast i will see them taking a levels and then telling me that they are having their super duper long hols!

then i will get jealous.

haha~!

had been talking and discussing about their graduation vacation!

i have been overseas, but its only with family, nv once in my life was with friends!

okie i think i'm making myself sound old when i'm not...

but really, i hope it can really be a wish come true!

i wanna go backpacking...coz its so cool!

but wella, now its not the time to think of these...

alrighto!

time to turn in for the day!

my complexion is getting worse man! help!

night! and bYe!~

2009-01-02T00:25:00.002+08:00

heyo!

blogging once again!

had a bbq with ex-tuition peeps, was nice!

din not eat much coz somehow, the pit was always overcrowded.

met them again and really missed them haha! though we din not talk much....

christmas and new year...was uneventful...as i need to go to my parents' stall to help out.

nowadays im so lethagic. not wanting to talk much.

mst was bad like again?

can i just go to the nearest wall and bang real hard against it?

i currently having a mixture of feelings and they are swirling in my head. i cant stop them and think straight.

mood swings are so casual, come and go as they wished.

affecting not only self, but others as well.

as we grew older, alot of things are seen and interpreted more tranparently.

the decisions we make can involve alot of people.

i'm weak.

i dun even have the courage to stop things from happening.

words came up to my mouth, but stopped right there.

nothing comes out in the end.

just me swallowing back the words.

i have a real lack of self confidence.

many a time, i only see myself as an useless bum, doing nothing to improve anything.

i always say, but no actions done.

i'm such a coward.

i afraid of losing when i did not even make an effort to hold on to anything.

i'm tired.

i really hope time can freeze and i can fall into a deep sleep which i do not want to wake up from.

bye~

i just realised, the six of us had no photos....

2008-12-29T01:05:00.004+08:00

i dunno if you will be reading this, but...i still wanna say it here. they are your friends and what they are trying to do is help you get over this difficult period. but what you are doing now is cooping yourself in your own little shell and not taking any advice given by them. they have already done what they have and gave in their best effort. dun say things like, 'i din ask them to do that, its on their own willingness.' if you really say that, i will really wanna bash you up. everyone cares for you, but you are building a wall, so high that allows no one to climb over to reach you....

sort of looking forward to tuition BBQ? haha! sch is starting in like less than 12 hours time!
arghhhh...end of hols is the worst thing ever man!now, my aim, save money for my trip next time! claspsssss! ^^
nights poeple~

2008-12-26T23:14:00.002+08:00

went to visit Timothy's blog...
wow!
the pics he took, nice man!
the short story...creative=)
how i wish i can take shots like him...haha
today! another day spent outside...
went shooting at marina barrage, but ridiculously...i was terribly late.
we arranged to meet at 10am at marina bay mrt.
but stupidously and forgetfully, i din set my alarm nor did i ask anyone to wake me up and i went to sleep.
so next mornng, upon wakinf up on my own, i saw the time was 9.20!!!!!!
so i jumped up and quickly sms-ed ym tt i will be late...
guess what time i reached?
an hour and 40 minutes later at marina barrage...
ohmygodnesss, y am i always late?
maybe i cant survive on my own..haas
there nothing much to shoot so ya, went off to have lunch at plaza sing.
somehow, i only eat yong tau foo in food courts, no others...and the ingredients i get is like THE SAME...how boring...
after that, headed to mrt to meet our class guys, namely chee yang-chan wen-chong ping.
so today, the class outing---me, ym, sy and the guys...plus a guest, Jolene=)
alot of them cant make it, but ym still carried on with it, not wanting to cancel it.
but i guess, its a good thing...
lesser people, but we still enjoyed!
played quite a few games and had lots of laughter, CHEERSSS!
we did not take pictures! awww
was supposed to meet shuping they all, but in the end, didn't=(
but in the end, after sy and jol left, the rest of us went for 'dinner'
y 'dinner' leh?
coz they only had dessert and i had nothing!
haha
omg, we laughed like no one's business.
its the corner table we got and you know, echoes~
so ya=*}
then trained home!
and taadaaa!
end of today!

some people idiotic jiu hao, dun pull people in together la!
people can be nice and gentle, y cant you?
are you not a guy?
well, i'm not angry, but just pissed with ur actions and stuff...
you are nice, but sometimes not as nice...
yesh! thats all~
i wanted to post some pics, but i lazy upload! Roars...
goodebye!~

2008-12-25T00:45:00.003+08:00

<14岁妈妈>
this is the jap drama i currently watching.
this girl, 14 years old, got pregnant because of love, gave birth because of love...
she went through alot alot just to give birth to this little girl of hers..
she ignored the resistance in the family, ignore her friends' fornot forgiving to her pregnancy, ignored the neighbours and other people who threw her weird glances, even those who alienate her.
she was only 14 and yet she can give up so much just to have this baby born.
she grew up in a family full of warmth and happiness.
she listened to how happy and blissful her parents felt when she was born.
so she decided, she wants the baby born, so that she can see her.
keeping in mind that she wants to see her baby safely born, she held on to her believe, that even as a young mother, she can still give birth to a healthy baby and will be able to watch her grow...
but nothing is perfect.
she almost died when she was in labour, which was a month earlier than her expected labour date.
she lost too much blood,but her baby was well, safe and sound in the ICU.

in this drama, alot of things can be seen.
the practical side of the reality, the warmth of the family portrayed and many more.
parents do stuff uncontrollably for the sake of their children, at any price.
as an outsider, when u ask them why they choose to do so, their only answer will be, 'because i'm a father.'
they forgive and forget whatever wrongdoings we have.
though they are angry, Miki's parents still stood by her to accompany her throughout the process of pregnancy.
though there is nothing much she can do, miki's teacher still tried her best to protect the interest of miki's future education.
though she had hurt her once, Miki's best friend still plucked up courage to reconcil with her and tried to stand up for her as well.
though he was young, as a 15 year old father, he still knows what is called responsibility.
though he was really young in the family, Miki's brother still show how much he cared and loved his sister.
Miki was strong and couragoues.
you should see the face of hers when she saw her baby for the first time.
the doctor asked her to touch the baby, saying that babies will know if the one touching it is their mother. if it is, the baby will feel safe and gradually fall asleep.
she cried when her baby help her by the finger.
those little tiny fingers. small yet filled with strength, circling her whole hand onto her mother's finger, feeling secured with the touch.

there are many circumstances where a person have to grow up and face the music.
this drama just showed one of them.
after having the baby, Miki grew up into a mature girl.
she will think seriously before she makes a right decision.
though the road ahead is tough, she will still carry on, won't she?

yup, i haven yet watched the last episode. but i guess, it wun be good coz the baby somehow isn't in pink of health. anyway, the baby is only 1648g at birth!
i dunno if this is a true story, but it sure touches people's hearts.
cheers!!
goodnight!

2008-12-23T00:47:00.003+08:00

today was yet another day at home.
went out for dinner and movie with junhui, qingren, kel and weiyu.
watched twilight.
we wanted to watch yesman, but but but, the show starts late and means will end late and means i have to go home late and sleep late.
but the thing is after the movie, we still went to mac to have an ice cream till 11! if we watched yesman, we could just nice end at 11 and then off home we go! and my parents, drove me from jurong point to have supper! so here i am, still coming home late and sleeping late...
wells, right.
the movie.
how should i say?
though i didn't read the book before, which i will sooner or later..., i dun really like the movie. everything happens real fast.
its like happening too fast that some parts seemed impossible and weird.
like harry potter.
though the three hour movie is a long time, the movie is still a summed-up one.
i guess that is the bad thing of having a novel being converted to a movie...
i wanna watch other movies!
another movie coming up that is also from the novels is going to be 'shopaholic'.
i hope it will be nice=)
now i shall ahve to help my parents at the stall for these next three days, til x'mas is over!
and i should say, no celebration it will mean!
dad's bdae is 24th but we ain't gonna celebrate i think...coz we did on sun!
went dinner with family at zheng fa huo hai xian!
awesome is the word.
and one more thing, the tuition.
i bet i'm just too nice to them?
they are going on a holiday and they are not telling me till i asked?
dun they have the kind of common sense to just inform me earlier?
its not like i have the whole world's time just to tuition him.
if they want, they can sack me or i can sack them!
no doubts about it.
what's with the other tuition has got to do with me?
i suppose it's out of the way, not at all my business to worry?
i know i have to endure it as it was me in the first place wanted this assignment.
i shouldn't give up.
no matter what, i will continue to teach till they request me to quit.

alright, the pics, i have to wait tilli have energy to upload, as i'm gonna turn in soon!
bye everybody...

2008-12-20T23:35:00.002+08:00

hey people!
moi back since 15 dec!
thisweek passed rather fast...rah! and one more week to go before the new school term starts, saded.
tue and wed, o had been a good girl!
i went to help out at the stall=)
not exactly tiring though as i expected i will be.
and then, 4e4'07 chalet!
erm, should i say, 'alot'of people turned up?
yea, some people did made an effort to come, and some cant come due to certain reasons, but if you promised someone something, shouldn't u do it?

that, aside!
i really have an urge to say something.
but really, my sec school class guys are MUCH better than *toot!*(those few, if you get what i mean...)
i really ponder over the matter of 'why the huge diff?'
Gosh

today, was the outing.
at arab street.
screwed is the word.
this is the first event that shuping and i organised.
though it isn't any big event, it's still involves preparations.
right, i was pissed with myself and not others.
i was really sorry to those in my group.
i dun mean to give that kind of a face.
but partly is coz i only caught an hour plus sleep in the morning at the chalet before leaving for home then to the event.
so i was really drained.
i was really touchy and i know you all can feel it.
everthing was clumped together and i had to juggle among them so my lousy management landed me with an exhausted self.
u all need not feel bad k?
i wasn't that active i guess and i took it for granted that organising events will be less complicated.
i'm sorry i made you guys feel so dull after the outing.

well weeellll, let me tell you all something.
just now on the way home from bugis on the train.
i was alone and without a seat, so i leaned against a 'wall'
i was totally drowsy and i kept 'ka nua' and almost fell!
i was wondering if there are people watching so i kept looking around after i do my stupid mouth.
its joke man! i mean, if someone really laughs very hard then i will never go cy!
gosh, i'm tired and i need to sleep!
goodnight people!

2008-12-15T14:24:00.005+08:00

Right, its been a few days since I've blogged.
So here am I, blogging!
To start off, i had something to show..hee
i was looking through my notebooks and i found a "poem" i had written for myself when i wasin secondary school?
Yup, a poem.
This is how it goes:

Twinkle, twinkle little stars

How I wonder what you are

Up above the world so high

Like a diamond in the sky

Twinkle, twinkle little star

How I wonder what you are!

Always smile and never frown,

look up straight and not look down!

Coz you never know who will fall in love with you!

treat all as friends and family too!

things on the bright side are beautiful,

and find everyday all fruitful!

If you are sad,

dun feel sad,

and sing a song sung by a handsome lad!

Leave a day with a SMILE,

as it goes a thousand MILE!

Always smile and never frown,

Look up straight and not look down!

there there, my poem.

When i read it now, i find that i was really naive at that time, to have written this poem in my notebook.

alot of things are beyond our control and thus we cannot hastily decide and hope for the best to happen.

else we might at the end of the day, regret the decision we had made for ourselves.

next! i went to collect my cheque on wed and had lunch with my colleagues.

I guess i'm not working this hols, since its already the second week!

they were still as per normal, nothing big happened i guess.

working is not as simple as it is.

alot of back-stabbing, behind the curtain bickering and all.

the black and unkempt sight of life is viciously showing their true colours...

went out with ym they all to CHIHUAHUA!

the movie is cute!

dogs, i no longer afraid like i did in the past!

"small yet couragous" "人小志气大" (should be this meaning=])

another movie i caught last week was wild child, with junhui.

another nice movie.

BUT! we missed the whole first part of the movie! AWWW~

its still as nice though!

next after the movie, we went kbox-ing!

triple horrays!!!

junhui sang very well! hee~

I'm still better at chinese songs(though i cant sing them well hee)...english songs, i love to listen=)

canto songs!

i wanna learn to sing them!

argh, now i only know how to sing two songs....more to come, i hope! =)

yep, 4e4'07 chalet is the 18th to 20th.

im having the dance concert on 19th?

spp event on 20th?

gosh...!

how....maybe i should not go?

AWW~ how leh...

oh almost forgot!

i got myself a new backpack!

its simple and cheap!

i dun wanna spend too much on bags as i know i am a clumsy person and i do not take good care of my properties, so yea, got a cheap one, costing 28 bucks after a discount! GEezz=)

bought it at bugis street! yay!

me, sy, Sy's fren-jolene, weifen=)

anyways, going off!

cyas, bye.

2008-12-09T22:48:00.029+08:00

heya people!

back to blogging!

well, had met up a few of the people these few days and was down with a report, so i had not been blogging.

first, marina barrage!

its a place that is built to show how water can be manufactured in our country..without depending on other countries? hmm

anyway, its a spp event haah

this was part of the ceiling=) tried taking with flash and without flash, but i realised, and wondered, how come no diff one lehh? ya, so i duno this was taken with or without flash!
wondered why the people in this picture all upside-down? heh, coz its the reflection of the people looking at the 'reservoir' and i'm taking the water spray on top with the mirror there=)

i dunno what is this actually, its just a structure on fixed on the wall? but the shape of it is nice=)
this was the whole map of singapore i think? i not sure, but they were below our feet! we were standing on a platform that is transparent and below it was the map of singapore, showing the different parts...and this is Jurong West! the district i had been for whole 17 years! and many more to come though...

i was a little dumb, coz i'm scared to stand on the platform. coz the moment i look down its like i will fall through...bleh...

this the half overcast sky=) the weather that day was superb! no blaring sun...it rained before the event started, but after the rain stopped, it was a nice evening spent there!
this was just a random shot at the ledge..
i was actually looking at the boat/or-duno-what for some time as it procedd farther and farther from the spore flyer before i took out my cam to take this shot...and thus the boat seems so small as i wanna have it together with the flyer! hee

frisbee boy! this boy is cute!

this boy too! adorable! we were playing with the water there and we saw many kids there playing...some of their faces and reactions are classic shots man, but cannot capture them haha...they ar ejust so naive and innocent! just by looking at them lifts my spirits, make me forget what i am doing for a while. sometimes, this little while means alot=)

next are shots of us! shichieh, doreen, szeyin and yumin and of coz me!

this, waa, a bit forced ah. i thought they wanna jump together with me but after i left my things down and turn around....all of them standing in a row, taking cameras=/ so i jumped! and cool leh, i jumped higher and more presentable (else i will jump star shape) than before and more cool is, timothy and doreen managed to capture it! wow! =)

this was either doreen's camera or timothy's camera, i dunno which is which...

szeyin sho nice, accompany me jump! haha! this should be the most successful one for this one? haha

i dunno yumin zoomed in when she took this pic! and my eyes so small! is pea-sized can? and my pimple filled face=S =(

cheeeeeseeee! says szeyin's fingers!

she will pose when a camera faces her, nice model lehhh=)

can guess whose set of teeth is these? winner, too bad no prize la! if want prize, find yumin ok?

alot of unglam photos uh...ya, big face!

yay! new member of spp! Shi Chieh! whee!

cheese!

oops! sorry, i should have cut the feet off! but rest assured do, i'm still the shorter one!^^

"can give me back the million dollaars u borrowed form me?"hehehe

group photo 1, me as photographer...

i like this! us 05 girls in spp! three cheeradesss! ^^

most of the pictures of us are taken using doreen's camera and other cameras, thankx ya!

next, is outing with a few 4e4 peeps...let me name them all ( shurong, brenda, diona, tze hsuan, kok leong, edward, kendrick, jonathan, cheng yong, jeremy)

went CU to have dinner and laughed alot! had a really fun time with them! though not many people were there, but still, enjoyed=) after CU, we went secondround...prata! heard of prata bomb? haha! its with sugar inside and very small....we left at around 10 and bused home....really nice!!!

on the bus, i nothing to do....with shurong

yay! three with three missing! RAH!

today! went for "chihuahua" with doreen and szeyin and yumin and another fun time out! and i was reminded that i needa buy clothes for new year! but but, broke now...how how?

photo of the day? haha! ^^

wowow! spent an hour or so on this post alone! RAH! tired out~

gonna sleep soon soon soon! coz my 'headaches' are gone! wahaha! i know i'm being mean, but...cant help it? =)

cyasss=)

2008-12-08T16:01:00.001+08:00

really pissed..
nothing seems to go the right way, all haywire.
what i want to do now is scream

2008-12-05T22:45:00.004+08:00

hey people!
know what are here?
Holidays??!
but but but, no need be too happy.
coz its only three weeks lar..
better than nothing u might say =)
i really have to juggle my time properly...enough of slacking around.
i wanna work..
to help to lessen the burden..
but i will just spend away the money...though bit by bit...but its still go away fast!
however, i truly glad that i 'm not too rich..if not i cant really know how to be thrifty.
anyway....tmr will be the start of holidays!
watch my dramas...accompany parents to dinner(but not me footing the bill though)...and tuition...and reports to submit...and and what else?
edited~ @ 3.07 am
wondered y i haven sleep?
haha
was doing cross stitch! reenie passed me a cross stitch..saying its her mom who bought it.
but she dunno how to do so wanted to give me..
but i told her that i will finish it and give it back to her.
its a simple picture, but its quite tough to do...and its very small!
its a bookmark=)
i started on it a long long time ago...but only manage to complete a little part.
so today, decided to continue!
i thought i could complete it...but =( not yet....but its 3/5 done?
hope i can finish it by tmr and pass it to her^^ jiayou to moi!

got to go! cyas=)

2008-12-04T23:13:00.002+08:00

tralalaS~
goodie!
one last one more to go...then tmr is bowling!
no money ah! 怎么办嘞?
gonna finish watching dramas!
let me name what i'm watching currently...
Aishiteruze Baby....Jap
Vampire Knight Guilty...Jap
霹靂MIT...Taiwanese
14 sai no...14 岁之母...Jap
通天干探...a HK drama on Channel 55
RE-WATCH...终极一家...Channel 56 a taiwanese drama
斗牛要不要...again a taiwanse drama and channel 56!
i should be able to complete them this hols...if i not working:>
and also...work...no..is homework!
2 reports to be handed in...one is due on sch reopen...another one due next mon!
need to hand in means needa go to school!!!
i have to do the collating ba i guess..., else..who leh? hope this report...even without help and advice from ym or sy...will be a presentable one...haha..=)
tmr is pathology... RaAH!
cyas!

2008-12-01T23:17:00.002+08:00

haish...still haven finish my studying.... hopefully can finish soon soon!
anatomy...argh.
ate alot!
biscuits...
thats why the biscuits in my house is always finishing so soon...
main culprit is non other then moi!
yesterday i arranged tuition @ 12..
but in the end, the mother got the wrong time.
she thought i will be going at 12 plus!
but the thing is i told her like a week ago?
when i was almost reaching the void deck, she sent me an sms asking me to go at 1 instead!
Rah!
wasted my time larrr waited at her void deck for like one pathetic hour?!
was really pissed voz there is really no where for me to sit!
there is construction site at her void deck and the only place for me to sit is beside a huge pile of garbage!
so so so, basically is stand for the one hour lo.
i was really angry, but the mother only asked for half an hour of tuition.
i was quite guilty, but who ask them make me wait leh? hmm...
stuying makes people emo, don't u agree?
i wanna sing!
gosh, but i AM BROKE...
sometimes will think of some sad things out of a sudden or when watching some dramas which will remind us something sad.
was watching this taiwanese drama while i took a break from studying.
in the end cried when the father of 5 died without even seeing the face of his newborn...
i thought, why is it only i am crying, but others just stare at the tv.
isit because im weak?
hmm
when i see people die on tv, oldie memories flashed pass.
and without fail, i will cry.
there was once i saw my mom cried when her sister, my second aunt, passed away.
its only us, me and my mom.
she cried for a while, before picking herself back again to join the others downstairs.
i will never forget it...that scene.
never will it disappear from my mind.
that is when i saw the weak mother of mine.
people gets really weak when it comes to family.

sorry for making this post so sad. all these are just memories. they dun stand much in the future. just let it sediment deep deep down..... life and death is just part and parcel of life, isn't it?

2008-11-29T23:23:00.002+08:00

read Adrian's blog, say he hadn't seen hiroki and yanto for a long long time...
yup, i'm kinda anti-social...
not seeing alot of ppl for a who-knows-how-long time!
missed them alot though we ain't close=(
i missed them like how much i missed my secondary school days.
i had changed, u too, him and her, we all have changed.
the difference is just whether we have changed for the better or for the worst.
i hoped i had changed for the better, but who knows?
all of us have got a new group of friends, no longer hanging on to the past stubbornly.
i did cling on to the past before, but now, i'm not.
whether to choose these path is right or wrong for me, i can't change now, or in the future.
i may not be meant for what and where i am now, but i will continue to survive.
on a lighter note, i'm just trying to say that...i still miss my girls and i hope they are too. \
=)

2008-11-27T21:29:00.014+08:00

tralala~ i realized someone uses the same as me -> tralala!

but nvm, i will continue to use it!

suddenly wanted to upload some pictures taken on my cousin's wedding...few weeks ago?

so yaaa....will introduce who are in the pictures along the way ya....

brother and qiang

brother and zorin

celine and zorin

me and zorin

us again..hahah

some sneaks shots taken by zorin...cute uh....=)

mom, moi, zorin, brother and ping=)

kareen, zorin, jessie, mom

zorin and jessie..she just upgraded, becoming a mommy and on that day, she was the female lead's sis! she is the mother of ariel!!! *claps*

kenne, mom, kareen, celine, zorin and brother! my mom got there just in time for the pic....

waaa, dun get scared by her uh....hehe, last friday me, ym, sy, sc sat at mac to have ice cream haha...it was after gems! coz the gems lecturer was efficient that we can be dismissed after 45 mins of lecture? wahahahhah!

*say cheese!*

took this yesterday at dover mrt station! just a random shot here...

tralala~ haha, jurong east mrt there have alot of such shots to take! =)

today i finally flared up in front of the boy at tuition. gave him homework, he dun do...rah! 'i can be nice, but if you dun do my homework, i will be very nasty!' is what i said. but i dun think he learnt his lesson though...=(

but tutoring isn't a bad thing at all, i get to be more patient. however, i have to learn something and that is punctuality!! sobsob~

mst mst mst....jiayou peeps!

2008-11-25T23:21:00.002+08:00

my speed of studying is just so slow... wadeva~
anyway, yesterday mood was dampened.
now when i think i had to go tutoring on a sunday....
nevermind, hols are here, i should have more time?
i guess not.
I should be going to work?
wait for them to ask me again?
i dunno...
working there ties me down, i cant really do much during the weekdays.
though i can skip work, but i think its not a good idea?
coz i needa learn to be more responsible?
hmm, yea shall wait for collegues to contact me again.
just in case they dun need moi?
haha=)
gonna sleep...byeeee

2008-11-24T20:08:00.002+08:00

wowow~ tmr can come home early! erm, not exactly early, but at least can come home right after sch! study is what we all have to do... wed skipping sch, coz i wanna go for the eye screening! 3 hours... yumin and szeyin, i promised so i had to go=) i will sit with ws on thurs ba, my purnishment...
mst really suck can, i had no idea how to start studying--anatomy and microbio
no revision week, just go into mst straight away! gosh gosh....the previous time we had 3 weeks before mst, i already did so badly....this time...confirm much much much worse larrrrrrrr.
somemore, the mother of the boy is very busy uh, always cant accomodate my timing. grrrr. nvm, i can persevere, though i cant guarantee her son's good grade, but at least my goal now for him is he can put in a little effort to get his work done properly!
gonna study! bye! =)

2008-11-23T23:30:00.002+08:00

parents are finally back! hehe, though no more big double bed for me, i still prefer them to be home! my dad told me a joke la....he was on the coach...and he is a huge snorer....den....he snored very very loud while hw was sleeping on the coach...till...the person beside him stuffed cotton into his/her ear!
gosh, my dad was 'powderful' uh...
tt is y i dun really like to sleep with my dad. if i had to, i will demand to sleep before he does. else, i will have a hard time getting to sleep larrr.
i want to go k boxxxx:> wanna sing sing and sing!!!
tests coming...study study!
feel myself getting ironic sometimes...
willmake some cookies after mst ended? hee...:>
anyway, the boy i gave tuition to...whoa...really have to be patient man! work anyhow do, ti'm trying to brainwash him...saying he had to put effort..coz he is really bad in his studies, failing everything. i asked him to do stuff that he should be very familiar...but in the end its a fail when i marked!! whenever i wanna be very stern, i will remember i had to be patient...be patient...be patient!!! gosh....he dun make me flare up..this is oni the forth lesson.
anyway, byee for now!

2008-11-22T20:48:00.003+08:00

wowow~ ok i feel guilty...but its really nice to be out all the way till morning?
haha. yesterday after sch went for a forum on lasik with shuoing and yiboon. COOL~ the talk. haha
they talked about the how the surgery was performed, how prestigous we are in terms of experiences and volume.
the talk was interesting somehow^^
after the talk we went for dinner at xin wang. we ordered some dessert and dim sum to eat while waiting for john to join us. when he came, he ordered pineapple bun and one of the toast and the macau coffee. the coffee is nice leh, though i seldom drink coffee=S
the dinner was a fun one! we just simply laughed and laughed. the place was so crowded and buzzling with people.
=)
i enjoyed the breeze...the star gazing...chatting and everthing...

i hope this isn't going to start again..not asking me to go through another round of torment, another time will be enough to make me very upset. i shall not go near u again, i hope i can not even to think of you, maybe i will be better off....thanks alot alot, i will not trouble you again....this is gonna be the first and the last time?

2008-11-19T23:36:00.003+08:00

i broke my promise once again. vision got blurry again. was chatting with john and shuping. den we were talikng about our parents and how our dads aged. my tears can forever not win my family. i cant really mention about my family. as in not how they worked, how they cared for me. i cant, im not up for it. family is my weakness. its not the first time. i lost count on how many times i have teared due to this reason. im just not strong enough. this is a barrier and i can forever not be able to cross over.

2008-11-17T08:02:00.002+08:00

its really sad to see sad posts on frenz blog. it caused me to think that I'm really bad as a friend. i know i cant fulfil alot of things that i had to do, but at least, let me be the one next to those of my friends. i know some had gotten on, and need not really need me as a friend, but i still hope that they do think of me once in a while. really, i hope memories will last.
next, my parents. though they are always there for me, i cant be the obedient girl anymore. i feel stupid whenever i get annoyed with them or when my attitude towards them isn't good. sometimes a cry out will do good, but after the tears have dried, what had happened can never be undone. people say let bygones be bygones, but it doesn't do for me as i'm one who will hang on to the past and refuse to move on.

2008-11-16T15:21:00.009+08:00

went to my cousin's wedding yesterday morning! tired! coz i only slept for 4 or 5 hours..

We were rather late still and i din manage to take any pictures! gosh gosh...=(

After my cousin went over to the bridegroom's side, i was the only few left at in the house. so i slept with my niece! she is such a darling! getting more and more chubby as the days passed.

she was in the baby cot while i slept ont he bed. beside the room is a kitchen and the elders were all there talking. she did not even move at all at their quite loud talking voices! she kind of filter off their voices and concentrate in her sleeping...think"sleeping is more important...."

tmr having character development skit! haish....hope it will not be screwed up by me=(

i wonder how it feels to have someone less in the household...as in example, my bro got married and moved out. it will feel super duper weird! though i always say my brother irritating, i still prefer him to be by me...i know, everone has to grow up....i should get more mature. no one can stay by me forever, not even friends. they will have their own commitments....

maybe its a little to early to say all these, well well~

wowow~

there is one of our lecturer, age 24! gosh, right, i was mean coz i expected an ans larger than 24...29 or 30 maybe? cozz the way he dressed makes him really much older! my bro was 23 and their way of dressing is way to different!

haha, my bro sho nice eh...i forgot my labcoat and i called him to bring it to me at dover and he agreed just so readily! nice nice bro though a bit hateful sometimes i think=P

right, shall stop here, MST COMING!!!! *thunder roars* heeee, bye for now~!